A Mighty Fine Heist
by Veiladae
Summary: Donovan Hock's gala presents a shiny opportunity for both master thieves and petty thieves alike. About 50/50 Firefly and ME. Pre-Serenity. ME2. No slashes. Intentional short story.
1. Chapter 1- Opportunities

A/N: I do not own Firefly. That's Joss Whedon's. I have been happy to discover because it allows me to explore fresh stories in the 'verse, through reading and writing.

I do not own Mass Effect. That's Bioware's. It's a truly phenomenal game series.

Please feel free to read and review. This is my first attempt at a story of any length.

* * *

><p>"I'd be delighted to attend, Donovan Hock." Inara said with a smile.<p>

"Wonderful!" the man's face lit up. His wealth was evident from his attire and proper speech. "I look forward to our time together."

"Until then. Take care." the companion said.

"Certainly." Donovan responded.

His image on the console disappeared as the call ended. Inara wasted no time peering over her shoulder.

"How long have you been standing there?" Inara asked. The pleasantness in her voice completely replaced by annoyance.

"What?" Mal poked his head into her doorway. "Is that an invitation in to your shuttle?"

She glared at him for a second, then stood up and waved him inside. He sauntered in, thumbs under his suspenders and big smile on his face, evidently really pleased with himself.

"So...," the captain said. "You managed to find a decent fella out in this le-se pian of a system?"

Inara eyed him suspiciously. He was a little too smug. "Actually, yes." She answered. "And we will arrive at an opportune time. He is a well-respected businessman and famous art collector. He will be holding a social gala in a couple days' time." She moved to the couch as she spoke and began tidying up her tea service. "The only attendees will be other members of high society."

"Ah!" Mal said. "I love parties where the premise is to show other rich folks just how rich you are. Such a delight for you? Are you attending to be another display of his wealth and fortune?"

"He has asked me to come a day earlier than the party. I will be fulfilling many more… roles… than that." She stated her rebuttal with a playful grin.

"Such a pity you're the only one on this boat fitted for fancy parties." Mal responded.

"It is a good thing you have not been invited," Inara said with exaggerated arrogance. "Not really your kind of outing. Viewing art while sipping wine… I'm afraid you'd find it terribly dull. A common thief would feel completely out of place among high society in any context let alone…" Realization dawned on Inara. "Mal!" Her tone took on an air of scolding. "You will _not_ come to this party!"

Mal, leaned up against the wall with his arms folded in front of his chest, just shrugged and feigned confusion.

"Mal!" Inara repeated, as though he wasn't listening. "Donovan Hock's estate is no place for you or any of the Serenity crew. You do remember what happened last time you arrived unannounced to do your dirty work at a ball held for nobles?"

"Good ol' 'Ath'. What a sport!" Mal reminisced.

"Atherton nearly gutted you, Mal! Do be serious!" Inara was horrified to remember the time Mal nearly met his end on the wrong side of a sword. "You must promise me that you will _not_ interfere this time. Keep your business dealings to the back alleys and remote border planets where they belong."

Mal nodded, fingers crossed behind his back. "Cross my heart. We'll just drop off our cargo as scheduled."

"Thank you," Inara said. "Now if you please… I have things to do." She turned her back to him to return to her client console.

"'Course." Mal backed out. "Been a pleasure."

Mal obeyed Inara's request and left her shuttle. He had just been wandering past when he overheard the conversation.

_Donovan Hock_, he thought to himself. _THE Donovan Hock. What a shiny opportunity!_

This time his steps were purposeful. He knew who he wanted to find and where to find them.

* * *

><p>"You want to ask Mal if we can spend shore leave on the Citadel?" Zoe asked, calmly incredulous.<p>

"Yes! I've never been and it's just across the Serpent Nebula." Wash said.

"Just want to check my understanding." Zoe said. "You want to ask our captain to fly Serenity, a transport vessel used for smuggling goods, to the _capital_ of the Council -a place crawling with Alliance soldiers, C-sec officers, diplomats, the like- and just leisurely pass the time?"

Wash shrugged and nodded. "Yeah…"

"Honey, we've got fugies on board. We've got…"

Wash interrupted her train of thought. "I ain't suggesting we waltz in, arms linked, with those two. Nor anyone else. I'm talking about you, me, and some quality time together in a place that don't smell of manure or blow dust into places the sun don't shine."

Zoe smiled.

"A little sophistication would be a nice change." Wash continued. "Get a little culture."

"What 'culture' does the Citadel got that we're lacking?" Zoe humored him.

"Hmm." Wash thought. "They have ramen. Have you ever had ramen? I heard it's a delicacy back on Earth."

"Salty noodles?" Zoe crossed her arms. "I need more than that."

"They got motion pictures." Wash said. "Last time we caught a vid it was Blasto 2: Back in the Black. Remember how ruttin' awesome it was? Now they're up to Blasto 5 or something."

Wash put together his hands in a makeshift gun and said in hanar-speak: "This one wishes you would enkindle this!"

"That ain't culture." Zoe shook her head.

"We could always share drinks at one of the clubs while we dance." Wash suggested.

"Rather get impaired in the safety of my bunk."

"You're right." Wash finally conceded melodramatically. "I guess I'll just go alone. Pick up the latest version of Galaxy of Fantasy. Or maybe see if Sha'ira, the consort, has any openings…"

"You won't!" Zoe playfully attacked Wash from behind.

Their laughter and play-fighting turned to kissing just in time for Mal to enter the cockpit. He quickly covered his eyes. "Don't y'all have personal quarters to get busy in?"

"Those same four walls get monotonous after so many years." Wash said. "Sometimes us married folks gotta change things up a bit."

Zoe laughed and hit Wash behind the head playfully. "We're _not_, Sir. I'd never distract a man while he's working."

"Good to know we ain't all gonna crash and die on account of two married people's urges." He responded.

"You come up here for a reason, Cap'?" Wash asked. "Other than enjoy the show?"

Mal nodded. "Yes… Yes!" He remembered why again. "We need Jayne up here first though."

"On it." Wash said. He paged Jayne to the cockpit. It took a while before he arrived.

"What in the shen de ming-zi is so gorram important that I have to stop in the middle of my workout to come up here?" Jayne griped as he entered the cockpit, sweat rag dabbing his forehead.

Mal watched him enter. "Well, I'll speak my piece quick since we only got upwards of three minutes 'til the whole cockpit starts smelling like the inside of Jayne's bunk."

"What do you mean?" Jayne rung out his rag. "Is it gonna start smelling like gun oil and women up here?" He gave a devious smile and a grunt of a laugh.

Wash lifted a finger and opened his mouth to protest the sweat puddle, but Mal cut him off.

"We got work." Mal explained enthusiastically. "That's why I called you up here."

The three failed to show an ounce of excitement. Mal looked around at each of them as if he had just delivered the punch line of a joke and awaited his laughter.

"We know the plan, Sir." Zoe said, arms crossed. "Ain't sure I see why dropping off cargo in the middle of the dusty plain of a backwater moon like Odessa has got you grinning like a coyote found the chicken coop left open."

"Not that job." Mal waved it off. "That hardly passes as real work. We ain't had _real_ work in too gorram long. I'm talking 'bout another. An honest-to-God _heist_."

Jayne smiled big. "Like… An honest-to-God _payday_?"

"Y'all ever hear the name 'Donovan Hock?'" Mal said, an even bigger smile teasing his face.

"Sure have." Wash responded, seated at the helm. "Less than 5 minutes ago when you promised Inara you'd keep your captain's quarters to yourself."

"What?" That stole Mal's thunder. "Are you spying on me?"

"Of course not! Just innocently wandering by when I suddenly had to…" Wash looked around for an alibi. "Tie my shoes… For a few minutes. Long enough to hear you promise Inara you'd keep your scheming on your designated rock."

"She didn't designate rocks." Mal clarified. "She just don't want me 'interfering' with her date. Don't worry. Hock won't find _me_ on her side of the bed. She'll have her space."

"Ah," Zoe said. "So we've learned one thing about this Donovan Hock. He's a client." Then she added sarcastically, "That don't complicate things none."

"Ohh! I like the sound of that!" Jayne let out a childish laugh. "If he can afford Inara's rates, he must be stupid rich."

"This Hock got a job lined up for us?" Mal's second-in-command tried to put the pieces together.

"Ain't quite." Mal said. "I know we usually take work from folks who's willing to pay for smuggling and the like, but work's been scarce lately, or ain't paying good enough for a whole crew's rations. So, I'm taking the bull by the horns on this one. Hock _is_ the job and I'm the schemer."

Zoe eyed him. "Run that by me again."

"Ah, hell, Zoe!" Jayne spoke up. "Cap' knows what he's doin'. I'm on board."

"Thank you!" Mal said. "Some enthusiasm. See, Inara don't seem rightly informed. She thinks he's just another art-loving dandy. The kind of client she's used to. But this fella... Let's just say he ain't above cracking a few skulls if it lines his pockets and he's left quite a few bodies in his wake."

Zoe's expression spoke volumes regarding her skepticism.

"That don't sound like Inara's taste." She said. "You certain this is the same man?"

"Positive." Mal said. "Donovan Hock has quite the reputation as a smuggler and weapons dealer among the 'low-lifes' such as ourselves. Probably why Inara has only heard the 'patron of the arts' side of the man. Either way, man's got a stocked vault _full_ of priceless goods. He's throwing himself a party to brag to his rich friends about his being richer. And he's pure scum to boot. Don't you see? It's perfect! Ain't nobody gonna cry about a wangba dan losing a few valuables."

"Sounds like a dangerous sort, Mal." Wash pointed out.

"I reckon so, but that ain't nothing new." Mal shrugged.

"Don't a vault make things complicated, Sir?" Zoe asked, still skeptical. "And Inara? You _do_ remember the last time you showed up in her world unannounced, don't you?"

"Ah, I remember." Wash said, as though conjuring up a fond memory. "'Captain Tight Pants was almost skewered by the blade of a s-what? What was that word? Sword. Yes, that's it. Would've been a poetical way to go."

The three chuckled at Mal's expense.

"Wha…" Mal started. "_Almost_. Have you all forgotten that I won that duel? Besides, I've learned my lesson." Mal straightened up. "I ain't as impulsive as I used to be. I promised not to get in Inara's way and I won't. My plans don't involve her anyhow. She won't even know I came. Won't know none of us came. This stays amongst us, understand?"

Zoe and Wash eyed each other. Jayne rubbed his hands together in eager anticipation.

"I'm ready to get planetside and see some real action! Plus a little money ain't hurt nobody." Jayne stated excitedly. "Tell us the plan."

"We might as well hear it." Wash said to Zoe, rather intrigued.

Mal pulled up a seat and spoke low. "First, we gotta get to his estate without being seen…"


	2. Chapter 2- Secrets and Memories

The door to the elevator opened to the CIC. Shepard stepped out, running a hand through his short, brown hair which was still wet from his recent shower. He held a coffee mug in the other. Kelly Chambers was the first to greet him.

"Good morning, Commander!" She said, bright as sunshine.

"Morning, Chambers." Shepard said before a yawn overtook him. "Excuse me. I don't think I'll ever be half the morning person you are."

"No worries, Commander!" Kelly said smiling. "I will never be half the hero you are!"

Shepard smiled back at his peppy yeoman as he approached his private terminal. Kelly observed where he was going.

"You have no new messages, Commander." She said. "However, Kasumi would like to speak with you when you get the chance. She made it sound rather urgent. She is in the Port Observation Deck. Personally, I'm thankful she's requested you."

"Hmm… Why do you say that?" Asked Shepard.

"Well," Kelly answered. "She's a very closed-off person. I am usually able to read people very well, but she keeps her true feelings and self hidden behind a thick barrier. I mean, she's perfectly nice and willing to talk with people. She just never reveals anything meaningful about herself."

"Thanks, Kelly." Shepard said. "I'll keep that in mind."

"Anytime, Commander."

Shepard took a sip of coffee and headed back to the elevator. _That gives me something to do other than shoot the breeze with Joker or join Garrus in mining anyway. I know he hates that job, but seriously. There's only so many times a man can calibrate a gun before he's just piddling. _

The commander descended a level further. When the door to the Port Observation Deck slid open, Shepard entered to find Kasumi looking intently at a gray-scale painting. Genuine paint on genuine canvas. Not something found throughout the rest of the Normandy.

"Hey, Shep." Kasumi greeted him without looking over her shoulder. "I was hoping you'd drop by. Although, I'm surprised to see you here so early."

"I always make time for my crew," Shepard stated. He took a seat with his mug in front of the panoramic window displaying a myriad of stars.

"Course! Either that or it's one of those rare days on the Normandy where nothing more pertinent is happening than mining for Element Zero." Kasumi flashed him a smile from under her low hood.

Shepard laughed lightly. "You got me. I'm here all the same."

"Indeed you are. Seems the stars are aligning because my request is time-sensitive, so I'm glad there's time to make a side stop."

"Your 'request,'" Shepard repeated. "That's right. You boarded the Normandy because Cerberus had promised you something."

"Glad you remember, Shep." Kasumi said. "That's precisely why I called you in here this morning. The time has come for me to ask your help."

Kasumi stole a glance back over her shoulder at the painting again. Something in her demeanor changed slightly. Shepard noticed immediately. His now long time role in leadership had honed his people observation skills, which was fortunate given that he had to agree with Chamber's assessment. Even Kasumi's attire kept her true self shrouded in mystery. Her hood cast an ever-present shadow over eyes. Shepard tried to steer the conversation in a personal direction without being invasive. He genuinely wanted to get to know Kasumi as he cared about all of his crew members. Recalling the few details Kasumi had given him regarding her request at their first encounter via the advertisement screen, he remembered the name "Keiji."

"Was that a gift from your partner Keiji?" He asked, gesturing to the painting.

"Not quite. A memento, yes." Kasumi said. She smiled at the memory. "I was hired to steal that painting by an art collector. When I got there, I found that the painting was gone. Another thief had arrived there first and stolen the painting. I tracked him down and tackled him for it. That's how Keiji and I met. Obviously, we never returned the painting to our employers."

"He must have meant a lot to you." Shepard concluded with delicate tone.

"That's so obvious?" Kasumi asked. "Keiji became more to me than just a partner in crime."

"I'm sorry for your loss." Shepard offered his condolences. "I remember you saying Hock was responsible for his…" He left the word unsaid.

"Death." Kasumi finished his statement for him. She had stated it matter-of-factly. Shepard suspected that either time had truly numbed her emotions or she was just maintaining a mask in front of her commander. Chambers would have voted on the latter.

"Does this plan involve Hock, then? Are you seeking revenge for your partner?" Shepard asked.

"Nothing so simple-minded, Shep." Kasumi shook her head. "I wouldn't ask your help for something so silly." Then she added with a devious grin. "Plus, I wouldn't need your help if that's all I wanted."

Kasumi took a seat on the same couch as Shepard. Her casual posture seemed to contradict the seriousness of their conversation.

"This all has to do with a graybox. Keiji's graybox." She explained.

Shepard set aside his empty coffee mug and asked, "That type of implant is illegal, isn't it?"

"Yes, but that's not what gives this one its value. All grayboxes are designed to hold a person's memories and Keiji's did contain personal memories, but it was Keiji's secret that Donovan Hock wanted. He never told me what it was, but he had obtained information regarding the Alliance. Something he feared would result in a war if ever leaked to the public. He encrypted that secret knowledge within his personal memories."

"I see."

"This thing is bigger than me and Keiji, Shep." Kasumi said. "Hock has Keiji's graybox and has undoubtedly been trying to crack the code to access the information Keiji wanted to keep secret. Whatever it is, Hock either thinks or knows that he can benefit from revealing it."

"So, we need to steal back Keiji's graybox to prevent war?"

"Bingo." She responded, but then added sentimentally. "It may be valuable to Hock for the secret data regarding the Alliance, but it's even more valuable to me for the priceless personal memories hidden inside. Maybe I'll finally get to say good-bye."

A moment of silence passed between them. Shepard waited in case she had something to add. Feelings to express. Fears to get off her chest. Instead she just delved straight into the plan.

"So! I told you that now is an opportune time to steal back the graybox. That's because the graybox is located within the walls of Donovan Hock's vault on his personal estate, where soon he will be holding a gala for his other low-life friends. We'll attend, under assumed idents, of course. With all of the distractions of other guests, we should be able to walk right in the front door and steal it from under his nose."

"That sounds like a lot of potential for conflict." Shepard observed.

"Please!" Kasumi waved off his doubts. "Remember who you're working with. I'm a _master_ thief. This will be child's play."

"Do we have a Plan B, just in case?" He asked.

"You mean guns?" Kasumi smiled.

Shepard shrugged and smiled back.

"Don't worry. You'll be armed. Leave the details to me, Shep." Kasumi stood, pulled up her omni-tool, and started typing. "I'll send information regarding departure to your private terminal. Also, you'll need proper attire for the gala." He barely was able to see her wink under the shadow of her hood. "I'll send that up to your captain's quarters."

Shepard stood to leave. As he approached the door, he turned around to say one last thing.

"And Kasumi…"

"Yes?"

"Your need for closure on this isn't 'silly.' I would have been happy to help even if your sole purpose had been revenge. You're my crew. You can always come to me when you need help."


	3. Chapter 3- The Gala and the Heist

Inara walked down the corridor leading to the galley of Serenity. She could already hear Shepherd Book's voice and Kaylee's laughter.

"I simply had no idea how strong the coffee brewed at the monastery would be." Shepherd Book said. "I suppose they upped it a notch since it's the strongest thing we _can_ consume after our vows."

Kaylee laughed and looked into her own mug. "I'll bet it still tasted a might better than the grounds we got."

Shepherd Book smiled. "It was very authentic, no doubt, and got us through many an all night prayer vigil."

"Inara! Good morning!" Kaylee exclaimed happily when the companion rounded the corner and entered the dining area. Many crew members were already seated around the large wooden table for breakfast. "I love your dress. It's new, ain't it?"

Inara smiled at Kaylee's sweet demeanor. "Why, yes. You are very observant."

"You _do_ look ready for the day." Simon said to Inara. "Are we landing this soon? I thought we had until 11am Serenity time."

"You don't usually start your whoring 'til later at night, ain't it?" Jayne asked, mouth full of toast.

"Jayne!" Mal scolded as he entered the room. "That ain't no way to talk to a lady."

Inara glared at Jayne while she prepared a kettle for tea. "_Iam_ landing soon." she said. "I'm taking my personal shuttle to Bekenstein while you fly on to Odessa for Mal's drop-off."

"That's right." Mal said, sitting down to grab some slices of toast for himself. "This here's a win-win, seeing as how we both got work to be doin'."

"Bekenstein must be awful fancy if you're going there." Kaylee's dreamy look suggested she was imagining herself there. "Who is this new client?"

"His name is Donovan Hock." She answered. "He's a wealthy businessman and arts patron."

Shepherd's smile left his face.

Jayne grunted a laugh. "That all? You sure he ain't…"

Mal pounded his fist on the table to derail Jayne's thought. Everyone jumped. "...ain't also a renown olympic swimmer with washboard abs? Certainly! Inara only contracts with men who are _at least_ a triple threat. Rich, refined, _and_ handsome, to boot."

Mal shot a look at Jayne, who just looked down and continued stuffing his face. Inara eyed Mal suspiciously but let his behavior slide. She picked up her squealing kettle to pour her boiling water over her loose leaf chai to steep. She took a seat next to Kaylee.

"He is throwing a gala that I will be attending. I look forward to perusing his art gallery and speaking with other lovers of the arts."

"He's gonna love you!" Kaylee said. "You're so beautiful and smart and got lots of culture. I don't know nothing about art."

"But you _do_ know everything about engines." Inara squeezed her hand encouragingly.

"Yeah," Kaylee agreed. "I just need to find a rich, refined, handsome engine collector. Then I'll be set."

Inara laughed. "I'll let you know if I meet one."

Wash and Zoe entered the room, arms around each other's waists.

"Mornin', love birds!" Kaylee greeted them.

"Oh, I hope there's some grub left." Wash looked hopefully at the table.

"Make it a point to arrive on time and it won't be a concern." Mal said playfully over his coffee.

"Got here as soon as the misses would let me." Wash said, winking at his wife. He went to pinch her butt as she took a seat. She caught his hand in time, smirked back, and pushed him into his chair.

"Oh, dui shangdi de a-i! Spare us your antics." Jayne groaned.

Kaylee laughed. "Love is sweet, Jayne. Just 'cause you don't got it, don't mean others can't have it."

"Sweet," Mal agreed. "And a little nauseating."

Inara sighed amid the banter. "I guess I best be off." She stood to leave. "Everyone stay out of trouble." She glared at Mal intently.

"Wha-?" Mal said. "We got our drop and then we'll just be minding our "p's" and "q's." Doing maintenance, refueling, restocking… You won't see hide nor hair of us until you get back." He followed up the statement with a grin which went for innocence but lingered on deviousness.

Jayne laughed until Mal gave him another glare which shut him up.

"Bye, Inara!" Kaylee called out as Inara exited. "Hope you enjoy all the art! And sex!"

* * *

><p>Conversations began again organically among the crew members. Mal listened, but not to the words being exchanged around him. He listened for Inara's shuttle to leave its docking bay. When he was certain she had departed the Serenity, he interrupted everyone's conversations with a commanding whistle. All eyes turned toward him immediately.<p>

"Listen up." Mal said. "I wasn't wholly truthsome earlier. We got the drop-off, but then we got a second job."

"Finally!" Jayne said exasperated. "Can we finally talk about that?"

Puzzled expressions filled the room except from the four who already knew about the job: Mal, Jayne, Zoe, and Wash.

"What job?" Simon asked worriedly.

"Yeah." Kaylee said. "How come Jayne knows something we don't?"

"Yeah..." Mal conceded. "That was a mistake on my part seeing as how he can't insert his boot in his yapper long enough to keep people from getting suspicious."

"She don't know nothin', Mal." Jayne retorted.

"Let's hope not. Don't need her getting curious and meddlesome at the party." Mal said.

"_Who_ doesn't know?" Simon asked.

"_What_ can we finally talk about?" Kaylee inquired.

"_Which_ party?" Shepherd Book asked, fearing the answer.

Their questions came quicker than anyone could possibly respond to. Mal lifted a hand to silence their inquiries.

"We ain't seen real good work in a while." Mal started to explain. "When I overheard-"

"Eavesdropped." Wash corrected.

"-that Inara was accepting Donovan Hock as a client, I couldn't pass up the opportunity. You see..." Mal's enthusiasm for the heist quickly returned. "Hock ain't just a fancy art stuffs magpie, he's also-"

Mal was interrupted again, but this time by Shepherd Book.

"He's also a renowned weapons dealer and murder." Shepherd finished Mal's sentence.

The four in the know shot him inquisitive looks.

"He has quite the reputation. I'm shocked that Inara did not seem privy to that knowledge, but the man is truly two-faced and truly dangerous." Shepherd Book's expression was very stern.

"How the hell you know that, preacher?" Zoe asked.

Shepherd Book seemed unwilling to divulge that information.

"Well, don't matter anyhow." Mal spoke up again. "Preacher speaks the truth. What we got here is a low-life dirtbag with a vault full of treasures. He ain't gonna notice a few missing pieces and we ain't gonna worry 'bout taking from the rich to give to ourselves. Now, I've planned this out and the only ground team I'm asking for is Zoe and Jayne. The rest of y'all gotta stay on board Serenity and be ready to bail us out if the plan gets botched or we find ourselves in a pinch. We're gonna use the party as a diversion so we can…"

"You plan to crash _another_ of Inara's parties?" Simon asked.

"Mal!" Kaylee pleaded. "I was there last time you went to one of Inara's fancy parties. You punched a guy in the face. Almost got dead by a sword. Don't do that again! Not if preacher's right and this guy is so bad."

"Ta ma de," Mal cussed and buried his face into his hand for a moment. "Is that _all_ anybody can remember?"

"You're not likely to live that one down anytime this lifetime, Sir." Zoe mused.

"Stop interrupting the Cap' and let him explain the plan!" Jayne scolded. "I wanna hear about the payout again. Buck tons of creds, I hope!"

"That's the notion." Mal affirmed.


	4. Chapter 4- The Power of Money

Inara's shuttle landed smoothly on the landing pad before Donovan Hock's estate. He descended the stairs of the grand entrance to greet her. She cut the engines and opened the door.

"Inara!" Hock said smiling, extending his hand to help her out of the shuttle.

"Donovan." Inara reciprocated the smile. "What a pleasure to finally meet your acquaintance in person."

"Ah, the pleasure's all mine." Hock responded, looking her over. "You are even lovelier in person!" He kissed her hand. She offered him a brief curtsy.

"Please. Do come inside." Hock offered her his elbow. Inara linked arms with him and he led the way. The facade of his mansion seemed to be composed entirely of large windows, with concrete piers serving as the support structures. The occasional potted plant offered some greenery around an otherwise very modern, man-made building.

Two armed guards stood watch on either side of the double doors. They wore heavy armor with symbols Inara had never seen before- three horizontal rods within the outline of a sun. She assumed they must belong to some corporation offering security services. The guards nodded as the two entered. Inara offered a smile and nod to each. She was not unaccustomed to her clients using sentinels, bodyguards, patrol units… Any number of hired help designed to protect the wealth these men insisted upon boasting about. It was just a common peculiarity among the rich.

"I'm sure you'll find your stay here both comfortable and _inspiring_." Hock told Inara as they made their way down the corridor. He had emphasized the last word in such a way that amused Inara. She was a well-cultured woman due to her companion background. Fine arts and performing arts were among the fields she'd studied at the Guild and she had found herself to be talented at both. Hock surely knew this. Inara highly doubted from his composure and confidence that this was the first time contracting with a companion, but his smug look still insisted he had more to offer her that she'd ever experienced in an outing with a client.

They arrived at a large room which looked like a cross between an art gallery and a formal living room. The architecture of the mansion was very modern with sleek lines, right angles, and grey concrete. On either side Inara could see canvases of fine art expertly displayed. Each was illuminated by a bright light fixture and hung in modern gallery fashion. Arm chairs were dispersed into various sitting areas. Books lined certain walls, no doubt containing works of literature which were as priceless as the art on the walls. A fireplace crackled pleasantly in an alcove.

Hock eyed her, his smug grin growing. "What do you think?" He prompted.

Inara approached one of the dividing walls upon which hung various canvases.

"Picasso." She said.

"Ah, you recognize him." Hock came to her side.

"One of my favorites, actually." Inara turned to him. "Such a fascinating deconstruction of the elegance of human form into geometric shapes. He manages to display so many perspectives in one 2-dimensional plane."

"Have you any idea what it's worth?" He asked.

"I could never venture a guess." She responded. "Such work is priceless, regardless of how many credits anyone is willing to pay."

"Certainly," Hock seemed pleased with the answer. "Now you understand why I must post sentries at each entrance of the mansion and along the perimeter of the estate. This piece is go-upi compared the other priceless artifacts I have hidden in my vault."

Inara was slightly taken aback by his unabashed display of arrogance. She quickly hid her gut reaction and gave him the one he desired: Surprise. The game was on and she knew how to play it. Some of her clients approached their time together with shame and bashfulness. For those men, or women, she had to guide them through the union. Others, however, had a confidence and commanding presence that bordered on forcefulness. She was a registered companion and had worked with all kinds of clients. Hock's posturing was nothing new to her and his wealth unintimidating.

"I do understand," Inara said. "Please show me more."

* * *

><p>"This sure is as desolate as a moon can get!" Mal shouted over the whipping wind. "I can't see nothing!"<p>

"Maybe there ain't nothing here. No people." Jayne shouted back.

"Maybe we just can't see them past the dense dust storm." Zoe speculated. "Having to rely on the mule's instruments to navigate."

"Well," Mal shouted. "We got coordinates. Just hope there's something more than wind and dust at their intersecting."

Sure enough, in the horizon, a rectangular building began to take shape. The approach of their land speeder felt slow due to the flat terrain and dust storm which made gauging distances difficult. The navigation instruments indicated that the dilapidated building was indeed their meeting place. They parked the mule near it, but saw no other vehicles in sight.

_These are strange circumstances for an exchange_, Mal thought warily, fingering his gun.

Mal indicated that he would check out the building alone first. Jayne and Zoe hunkered down on the mule while he got on foot and headed toward the grey structure. Zoe, ever vigilant and mindful of the captain's safety, kept her hand ready to draw, just in case.

The building couldn't have been more than a 15 foot by 15 foot shack. Mal looked for windows or for any other way to peer in. He found one narrow one with a layer of silt, which he dusted off. The view wasn't great, but he was able to see that no one was inside. In fact, nothing was inside. This building certainly didn't look like it served any other purpose than providing shelter from the relentless dust storms of Odessa while shady business was conducted.

Mal returned to the group on the mule and told them the situation.

"Dongxi shi budu-i de." Mal growled. "These ain't the circumstances I expected when we accepted this job." Mal concluded. "This job came to us by a reputa... Well, semi-reputable businessman. This don't feel right."

"Could be a trap, Sir." Zoe shouted over the wind. "Maybe we should just leave this one."

"No ruttin' way!" Jayne demanded. "We came all this way. We gotta get paid."

"I ain't about to make a reputation for myself as a man who don't keep his promises." Mal shouted. "That's bad for business. 'Specially when there ain't hardly no offers anyhow." He bit his lip and cussed under his breath. "I'm going in. I ain't giving you orders to follow me, but… I'd take it as a kindness not to enter alone."

"Right behind ya, Mal." Jayne hollered after him. "'Sides. I'm ready to get out of this gorram wind."

"Got your back." Zoe agreed.

The three approached the building warily, hands near their holsters. They approached the door and opened it to reveal just what Mal had told them they'd find: nothing. The relief from the wind was a welcome change, but they found the empty room unsettling. They were accustomed to performing exchanges in open air, not confined within the walls of a tiny shack. Jayne hauled the cargo to the corner of the room that they agreed gave them the most tactical advantage, should something go awry. The trunk wasn't terribly heavy or cumbersome. The three readied themselves for anything.

The howling wind outside and lack of windows dotting the walls of the building masked the arrival of their cargo's recipients. Boots hit the dry ground and soon the door opened. Mal's heart leapt in his chest but he maintained his composure. In walked a strange alien wearing armor. His four eyes looked to be sizing up the smugglers as soon as he entered the room. He was followed shortly by a FENRIS mech and another alien comrade.

Mal quickly sized up the situation and got a sinking feeling the crew had finally gotten in over their heads. They were not used to working in Citadel space and were unaccustomed to the new technologies and evidently the strange peoples. He actively maintained his poker face and feigned a calm and collected composure.

"Humans." The alien said with disgust. "Where is our cargo?"

"Well, it's mighty fine to meet your acquaintance as well." Mal said with a tight smile. "We got it, but expect our promised payment first."

"No payment until we see the goods." His voice was deep and demanding.

"Alright." Mal said. "We're honest smugglers. We ain't trying to pull the wool over your eyes." He turned to Jayne, who looked paler than usual, and motioned him to pull the trunk forward. He stopped Jayne with his foot when he felt he'd gone far enough.

"Feel free to open it, but we won't take it kindly if you try to bolt before we receive our creds." Mal added.

"Is that a threat?" The other alien asked, closing the gap between he and Mal and glaring at him just a few inches from his face.

Mal didn't budge. "More like a friendly warning."

"Calm down, Trulik." The lead alien told his comrade as he used a code to open the trunk. The top flipped open to reveal little more than physical papers and files. He thumbed through them, eyeing Mal and his gang occasionally, as though expecting their faces to reveal some secret sabotage. "Looks good." He eventually said.

"Shiny." Mal said. "Then, we'll just be taking our creds and be on our way."

"Maybe we should forget the payment and take _you_ instead. And I keep these creds for myself." The alien Trulik grunted, back in Mal's face.

"That ain't like to happen." Mal said, standing his ground.

"Boss doesn't want any more unruly, disgusting humans under foot." The leader said. "Just take the trunk."

He continued anyway. "Maybe I shoot you down like a feral varren and leave your body for the dust storm. It wouldn't be the first time a rotten human disappeared under the dust of Odessa."

"Trulik!" The leader warned. "Grab the trunk."

"Best do as the man says." Mal glared back with an unwavering expression.

"I don't like your attitude." The alien continued at Mal. "You _humans_ are still new to the galaxy and act like _you_ should be in charge. You think…"

"Damn it, Trulik!" The lead alien scolded. "You're such a pain in the ass. Boss told us to come get the papers and leave the creds. These foolish humans have already agreed to smuggle these valuable slave papers for nearly nothing."

Mal's heart sank at the term "slave." The leader picked up the trunk and started to head toward the door. "Give that human the creds. You're going to earn triple that when we get back to the base."

The alien Trulik snarled at him and threw the bag down on the ground as he turned to leave. Jayne quickly reached for it and counted their loot.

"It looks right, Mal." Jayne said surprised.

"Check the mule." Zoe suddenly clamored out behind the aliens.

The pair and their mech had already boarded their own land rover. The mule looked untouched. Zoe still felt skeptical, so she hopped on board and fired up the engines. It hummed happily. She searched for obvious signs of tampering, but found none. She gave an exaggerated shrug to indicate all was fine. Mal and Jayne looked at each other, then joined her on the mule.

"Did that really just go off without a hitch?" Jayne asked incredulously, having to shout over the wind again. "But, what the hell are those things?"

"Batarians." Mal replied remorsefully.

"They're ugly as pack of wild dogs." Jayne shouted, looking over his shoulder at the departing land rover.

"We ain't dealt directly with them before," Zoe shouted soberly. "Known for kidnapping human colonists in the Terminus Systems. Selling drugs. The like. Usually ain't no good."

"Wangba dan!"Mal cussed and buried his face in his hand. "I can't believe we just helped another tyrant stay ahead for pocket change. I never would've taken the job if I'd've known."

"Ain't your fault, Sir." Zoe consoled matter-of-factly. "You _didn't_ know. Just trying to carve out a decent livin' for you and your crew. No shame in that."

Mal shook his head. "My sky's getting a might too crowded with foes. Problems wherever you turn. Ain't possible to make an honest living most places and maybe… Maybe there ain't no honest smuggling no more."

"Your next job's honest, Mal." Jayne shouted.

"Sure is." Mal agreed. "Ain't nobody losing in the next deal that ain't got it coming."


	5. Chapter 5- The Night Before

Inara and Donovan wound their way through his grand mansion. Every corner revealed new surprises, each more extravagant than the last. Large, picture windows offered panoramic views of a lush, wooded landscape. Flowing fountains were tucked away into alcoves and the corners of wide staircases. After it seemed there couldn't possibly be a place left unexplored, Donovan turned to Inara.

"I wish to share with you a view of my most prized possessions." Donovan said.

"I would be delighted to behold them." Inara smiled.

Donovan grinned smugly. He led her back down the stairs. It was significantly darker down below without the natural light filtering in. The entrance to the vault was heavily guarded, this time by technology instead of warm bodies. Electronic devices on either side served to confirm that whomever attempted to gain access to the vault was approved. Immediately when the two approached the entrance of the vault, an electronic voice stated, "Password required."

"Peruggia," Donovan responded.

"Voice I.D. accepted. Welcome, Mr. Hock." The voice said.

Next he moved to the left, to the other device. He lifted his hand before the DNA scanner and received the same approval. With that the red light on the circular door turned green. He approached the door, which opened when it detected his presence. It revealed a small room.

"We must take the elevator down. The vault is below ground for heightened security." Donovan explained.

Inara nodded and entered. The ride was quick. When the elevator doors opened, it revealed a truly breath-taking sight. The vault itself was incredibly large with ceilings several stories high. As with his art gallery on the first floor, the rare treasures in the vault were arranged in a museum setting. Each sculpture had a pedestal of its own and theatrical lighting. Artwork and other such pieces from many species' heritages and histories were on display. The collection was extensive.

Inara finally was as awestruck by the treasures Donovan showed her as his smugness implied she should be. She was not very familiar with other species' cultures, less than she would care to admit, but she recognized the most famous human contributions: Michelangelo's _the David_, the head of the Statue of Liberty, an ancient Egyptian sarcophagus... The list went on. Inara looked back at Donovan who instantly read her face.

"Please have a look around," He laughed. "Just don't touch anything."

"Of course." Inara said.

She let her natural curiosity lead her. From one display to another, she meandered, while Donovan offered commentary. He knew his artifacts well and thus served as an excellent docent. In addition, of course, he had a personal experience attached to each piece. She felt she was learning more about who Donovan was from his collection than from their previous conversations. Each piece could be tied to an interesting anecdote, a business ally, an interesting coincidence, and the like.

"I am not familiar with this fascinating piece." Inara said, pointing to a sculpture tucked away in the corner of the vault.

"Ah," Donovan seemed amused. "You are unfamiliar with _any_ Elcor art then?"

"I'm afraid so." She conceded.

"Don't stare at it too long." Donovan laughed. "Forta is known for making works that make the viewer go mad if looked upon too long."

Inara averted her eyes from the piece to look at Hock.

"That's why I keep it hidden away in the corner." Hock continued. "That and because I think it's a piece of yiwen bu zhi de lese."

"But it must be incredibly valuable to have found a home among your other treasures." Inara said.

"It is." Hock nodded. "It was given to me as a gift, actually. I never would have dropped the credits it would sell for to own this lese pi-an. I only keep it because it's valuable."

Inara nodded in understanding, not agreement, and thought: _What an interesting life to own priceless works because of your business connections and not even value them personally. This man has as many people in his network as pieces in his collection. I do wonder what exactly he does for a living. He had shown me everything and yet revealed nothing, it seems. _

She moved on to the next display table. She asked about a few more pieces of art before approaching a table which displayed various weapons and electronic devices.

"Hmm…" Inara approached a small, gray unit with which she was unfamiliar. "What is this?"

"It's a 'graybox.'" Donovan said with a strange smirk.

"I'm sorry. What is a graybox? Is it a weapon like the rest of these pieces?" Inara asked curiously.

Donovan laughed. "Not in the strictest sense, no. It's a little piece of technology used to store memories."

"How fascinating." Inara responded and dared to add: "Whose memories does it contain?"

Donovan's smile turned unmistakably sinister. "That man is dead now. He was no one important. You would never have heard of him."

Donovan's response spent a cold chill up Inara's back and she quickly sought to change the subject. She found another artifact to ask about, some old-fashioned weapon. Small comments he had made throughout the day, including that last one, made Inara wonder if his mysterious quality wasn't more near to hiding a secret. Inara meandered through the rest of the artifacts. She made a point to thank him for the tour before asking for fresh air. He obliged.

* * *

><p>The view from the balcony was gorgeous. Hock's estate seemed to have been built in the middle of an otherwise virgin forest. The sound of warbling birds and active crickets filled the air. As the resident of a starship, Inara had become used to metal walls; few windows, if any, which revealed the same points of light in a black world; and the hum of engines and various units. Inara often felt that she had to reacclimate each time they visited land. On-world environments were incredibly diverse, anyway. The climate, the weather conditions, the vegetation… Serenity's crew didn't usually stay planetside long enough to get accustomed to any of it. Mal was the opposite of many. He would get stir crazy if planetside too long. Inara knew it had everything to do with his history. He felt safest out in the black, surrounded by stars not people.<p>

Ultimately Inara felt thankful for the constant change because she always felt as though she were experiencing these things for the first time every time. Like she was constantly being reborn. She also loved the adventure and experiencing new things, new peoples, and new worlds. It was the main reason she had left Sihnon. At least, the reason she responded with when asked regarding her decision.

Inara breathed in deeply and took in the beauty of Bekenstein.

"The sun is setting." Donovan observed. "I will message the chef to prepare a special supper for two."

After a few brief strokes on his omni-tool, supper was in the works.

"I hope you enjoy veal cordon bleu." Donovan said. "I spared no expense when hiring a personal chef. You will not be disappointed."

"That sounds delicious." Inara said, realizing that she was getting hungry.

The two took their meal shortly thereafter. Servers brought each course in a timely fashion while Inara and Donovan talked. Salads, soups, an entree that looked like a piece art in-of-itself… Everything was superb. As they ate, Inara ventured a few questions about his line of work and the businessmen and friends who had given him various pieces, but he answered vaguely and steered the conversation back toward the estate and their evening. She had wished for the answers to satiate her curiosity, but didn't pry. She wouldn't have revealed much about Serenity and her crew, nor the Guild, either. Their time together wasn't focused on two individuals getting to know one another's personal life and histories. She knew that walking into this, and every, appointment.

When at last the plates from dessert were taken away by the servers, Donovan suggested they move to one of the alcoves with their wine glasses. She followed him to one with a wall lined with books, surrounding a fireplace. Across the way more canvases hung. They talked briefly about the works before Donovan turned to his hired companion and said, "I have shown you the beauty I have to offer and I know it was not lacking. I suspect you are ready to return the favor with an equally… _inspiring_ experience?"

Inara responded to his brazen appeal with an inviting smile. She knew from his personality that he would want to be the one to initiate their union, so she had waited. He took her wine glass from her hand and set it aside. Then he leaned back on the sofa and waited. She took her cue and advanced upon him as he wished.

* * *

><p>Kasumi sat alone in the Port Observation Deck. It was well after midnight and most of the crew were asleep. She had tried to get some rest, but was unable to fall asleep. Instead, she sat upon the cot provided for her and stared at the floor, hugging her knees. The Port Observation Deck was never intended to be someone's personal quarters, but she had requested a room to herself and Shepard had gladly accommodated her. He had been a big surprise to her. She was accustomed to working alone due to the nature of her job, working more with people's possessions than the people themselves. She had preferred it that way. However, Shepard had been very inviting and she found the crew had a special relationship, like a family, despite how diverse they were in race and background and skill. Before this adventure, there had only been one person she felt comfortable working with: Keiji. In the darkness, there was usually only one person she constantly thought about. One person whose presence she ached for... One person… One ghost.<p>

These same thoughts had been cycling through her head, not just preventing tonight's sleep, but many nights before this one, ever since… _it_ happened. The disquiet in her mind had prompted her to raid the liquor cabinet on the other side of the room a few hours earlier. It had been a convenient distraction. A nearly empty bottle occupied her right hand.

Kasumi looked around the room. She had thought to make it feel homey by bringing some of her personal belongings. However, each artifact had a memory tied to Keiji. He had been her partner, her best friend, and her lover. His death had left a void in her heart that she feared she would be never be able to fill again.

She sighed and looked down at the bottle. _There is no way to escape his memory… Nor do I want to._ She thought. A single tear rolled down her face against her will. _It doesn't matter. Soon… Soon this will all end and I will get to _experience _Keiji again… One last time, before I finally say "good-bye."_


	6. Chapter 6- So It Begins

**AN: I apologize for the LONG haitus. I had started this story in my third trimester of pregnancy, plus my husband was in grad school, so life happened. ;) I just finished writing a FemShep/Joker romance and feel ready to return to this project. Thank you so much for everyone who read, favorited, and reviewed this story!**

**Chapter updated to resolve minor conflict.**

Kasumi entered Shepard's cabin.

"It's time to get ready for the party." She declared.

Shepard sat at his private terminal reviewing his messages. He glanced at the time. "So soon? I already have the outfit you gave me up here and it won't take me long to change."

"That's not the only part of your disguise, Shep." Kasumi said grinning, holding up a box. "The rest is in here and trust me, you need my help."

Shepard eyed it suspiciously. "What else do I need?"

"You'll see!" Kasumi said.

She put the box down on the desk and started to unload it. Shepard logged out of his private terminal and planned to comply until he saw her pull out a tube of mascara and powdered eye shadow.

"Oh, no." Shepard pulled himself out of the seat. "I'm not dressing in drag for your performance."

"No, silly!" Kasumi laughed. "These are for me."

"Okay… Okay." Shepard approached the chair again.

"_These_ are yours." She held tubes of various shades of red and flesh color.

"Oh, no." Shepard backed away again.

Kasumi laughed. "You're going in _theatrical_ make-up."

"As a man?" Shepard asked.

"As a man." Kasumi confirmed and pushed his shoulders down into the chair. "Trust me! Just relax and let me work."

Shepard's knuckles were white against the arm rests. "The things I do for my crew…"

Kasumi started opening tubes and comparing colors. "Listen, we should go over the details. You don't just have an alias, but a whole persona. In order to make sure you are able to gain access to Hock's party no questions asked, I took the time to build you a reputation as well. You are Solomon Gunn. You run a small but talented band of mercs in the Terminus Systems. Hock will respect your line of work. Basically, you're walking into a den of thieves and low lifes. You need to look like one of them."

Shepard watched as Kasumi mixed different colors together with a thin brush.

"Lean your head back and close your eyes." She said.

He sighed and obeyed.

"So," she said as she started painting below his right eye. "You need to look the part. You'll be dressed as a 'respectable businessman' but your face should show the truth. You need to look like you've been through a few firefights."

"I _have_ been!" Shepard pulled away and looked up at her. "Just a few…" He added with mild sarcasm.

Kasumi chuckled. "Yes. Yes, you have. I know. But Chakwas did too superb a job clearing your scars and… Well, let's face it. You're too pretty."

Shepard furrowed his brows. "Remind me why I let you board the Normandy."

"Because we need each other!" Kasumi said. "Now, don't move any more or you'll mess me up and we'll have to start all over."

Shepard sighed again.

Kasumi worked diligently for a while, mumbling to herself occasionally, apparently very pleased with her work. It felt like an eternity to Shepard. She wouldn't let him open his eyes and his imagination ran wild regarding what she must be doing. Finally, she set aside her tools, clapped her hands together, and said, "Perfect!"

Shepard opened his eyes.

"Look!"

She put a mirror in his hands. He brought it to his face hesitantly. He was surprised to see a gruffer version of himself looking back. Kasumi had decorated his face with various scars and facial blemishes. They looked completely natural.

"Okay." Shepard conceded. "I'm impressed."

"Deception is in the details, Shep." Kasumi looked smug. "Oh!" She added. "Put this lens in also."

She handed him a tiny box. Shepard used the mirror to apply the cosmetic lens to his right eye. One white eye looked back at him.

"Oh, yeah!" Kasumi exclaimed. "You totally look like you've earned that article in _Badass Weekly_ I fabricated for you! Although..." She ran her fingers through his hair. "It would be even more convincing if we cut your hair to a…"

"No!" Shepard interrupted too quickly. "No. Just… No."

Kasumi laughed. "You're particular with your hair, I see!"

"Not really… It's just…" Shepard sought a valid excuse. "What about _your_ disguise?" He settled on changing the topic. "You won't be able to just walk in as Kasumi Goto, I assume?"

"Certainly not, Mr. Gunn." Kasumi confirmed. "I will be your own personal companion. Every successful 'businessman' should have one. It will make you look more respectable, display your supposed wealth and fortune, and help me blend in. No one will even try to talk with me. Hmm… On that topic, we need to work on your personality."

Shepard let out a small laugh. "That needs tweaking too?"

"You're too… Nice." Kasumi said. "I see how you are naturally with your crew. You are too kind and willing to listen and comfortable talking with anyone. That's a problem for our mission! Solomon Gunn needs to avoid talking shop with anyone. It could blow your cover. You need to… I don't know… Be less approachable."

"The creepy eye isn't enough." Shepard asked.

"No." Kasumi responded. "You need to practice _behaving_ as intimidating as you look. Walk around giving everyone the stink eye. You're dangerous and superior. Come on… Let me see it!"

Shepard thought for a second before screwing up his face into an exaggerated scowl. Kasumi doubled over laughing. Shepard glowered at her.

"Freeze, Mister!" She said, pointing at him. "That's the one! Your natural glare of disapproval. Look at it, study it, perfect it. I'm going to start getting ready myself."

* * *

><p>Mal stood behind Wash who was piloting the Serenity. The crew had arrived on Bekenstein as soon as the Odessa drop had been completed. They had been surprised to see the immense wealth displayed on Bekenstein. The contrast to Odessa was staggering. Putting the pieces together, it became clear that Odessa was a poor, forsaken moon used frequently for illegal activities which kept the money flowing to the wealthiest of Bekenstein. The notion put Mal in a thieving mood. He was ready to relieve scum like Hock of a few prized possessions that he wouldn't miss in favor of giving the poor, namely his crew, enough to afford basic needs.<p>

"I ain't rightly convinced by Mal's disguise. What's with the Wilford Brimley?" Jayne asked.

"Clearly he's going for the diabetes cowboy look." Wash remarked.

Mal stroked his fake mustache. "Check out this smart suede Stetson. I was going for rich ranching tycoon. Legitimate beef sells for a pretty penny. I reckon I own a huge ranch on a recently terraformed planet. I sell enough heads of cattle at a high profit margin, cuz I'm a scumbag who don't pay his workers, that I could buy myself a whole moon. Hell, maybe I just did."

"I think maybe it'd be best if you just don't talk to people." Wash said.

"Cap'n knows the agreement. He looks convincing enough. Ain't gonna destroy that with words." Zoe said. "Not sure the dress chosen for me adds to his respectability, though."

"'Respectability' means something different to these folks." Mal said. "You look rich. That's what matters."

"Your dress is my favorite part of this heist!" Wash exclaimed and stole a glance back at his wife. "I mean… I love being married to a warrior woman, but your-" Wash gestured with his hands. "-in that dress… We should participate in more heists which show off your backside."

"Yeah." Jayne agreed. "You should get gussied up more often so's we can all enjoy it."

Zoe shot Jayne a cold look. "Eyes to yourself, Jayne. Don't forget I'm still carrying a sidearm."

"And what about Jayne?" Wash asked. "He just looks all… Jayne."

"I ain't joining the fancy party." Jayne said. "Don't want to nohow."

"Jayne's got work to do elsewhere," Mal responded. "Whilst me and Zoe go play pomp. I'm thinking once we're in we're golden. Hock's gonna be too busy to even notice us."

The four peered out the window and watched as Hock's estate glittered in the distance. The amount of property owned by one man was shocking.

"Why are we gettin' so close? Won't they see us?" Jayne asked.

"They might." Wash said. "Shouldn't matter. Look at all the sky traffic from other guests. Our shuttle shouldn't cause concern."

"But the mule would." Mal said. "That's why we need to land in the cover of the trees. Navigate through the forest."

"Right," Wash said. "I see a clearing up ahead. Looks like a great place to hide."

"It'll work," Mal said. "Take us down."

Wash landed the firefly in an opening in the forest.

"We'll let you know once we've secured the loot," Mal told Wash. "Be ready in case we need a quick getaway."

"Yes, Sir. Cap'n, Sir." Wash gave a mock salute. "Keep my wife safe. I've got plans for later that require her presence."

Zoe smiled and hugged him from behind. "I wouldn't miss it."

The crew waved good-bye and offered well-wishes as Mal and Jayne exited the ship, with Zoe following close behind on the mule. The two hopped on the mule and they started navigating the dense foliage toward the mansion.

"Sure would be easier if we just contacted Inara and she let us in the front door." Jayne noted.

"Would've been," Mal agreed. "But Inara's the reason for our disguises. She can't know we've come. She'd probably slap me... Again."


	7. Chapter 7- Infiltration

Shepard's shuttle descended upon the landing pad before Hock's estate. The doors swung upward and he climbed out. Then he walked over to help Kasumi out. She refused his hand and said through tight lips, "I'm here to serve you, remember? You'll blow your cover with your gentlemanly manners!"

"Right," Shepard whispered back.

Kasumi climbed out of the vehicle, then took Shepard's elbow and lowered her head slightly. She certainly looked the part of a very traditional companion. The ornate fabric of her dress hugged her curves from the top down to her hips before splaying out into a flowing skirt. A transparent veil of sorts covered the top part of her face, her white face makeup and bright red lipstick still visible.

"Remember," She whispered. "You are one of the masters of the universe. Women are just objects to you and the other men: inferior."

Shepard squeezed her hand gently to acknowledge her reminder. The two passed by a guard who was scanning their gift to Hock: the larger-than-life sculpture of Saren. Shepard looked longingly at the sculpture. Despite the semblance of an old enemy, his weapons and armor were hiding in the base. He felt naked carrying only a sidearm, but Kasumi had assured him that was the only amount of weaponry that he would be allowed to enter with.

The two approached the stairs behind another group whose gift, some form of traditional weaponry resembling a katana, was being moved down to the vault. The party guests filed in past Donovan Hock himself, who greeted each personally. Guards on either side of the doors stood ready to handle any unwanted visitors. As Shepard ascended the stairs, he was surprised to find Hock was not standing alone, but had a companion of his own holding his elbow. She beamed when she saw him. Their eyes met and Shepard looked momentarily perplexed. Inara smiled and opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off.

"Donovan Hock!" He said, purposefully breaking his gaze to look at the host of the party. He stuck out his hand. "Solomon Gunn."

Donovan shook his hand. "Ah, Mr. Gunn. I am glad you were able to make it. I read you have been very busy as of late."

"True, but I wouldn't miss it." Shepard said. "Who is your lovely attendant?"

"Ah, this thing of beauty is Inara Serra." Hock gestured at her, but didn't speak to her. "A renowned companion."

"Indeed," Shepard said. He took her hand and kissed it. "A pleasure to meet you."

Inara studied his face searchingly. Hock cleared his throat loudly and she glanced up at him. He glared at her.

"Oh!" Inara started. "Yes. It is certainly a pleasure to meet you too, Mr. Gunn." She stated his name like a question.

"Do enjoy the party," Hock said, ushering his guests onward to make way for the next group.

"Certainly," Shepard said and entered with Kasumi.

"That's not treating women like objects!" Kasumi whispered a scold. "You'll blow your cover being too nice like that."

Shepard shrugged and whispered back, "It's going to take a little time to get used to my role, I guess."

The pair entered the main room and Shepard was impressed by Kasumi's accuracy in describing the situation they would be walking into. The man's wealth was evident by the architecture of his home. The room was immense in size, with the far wall comprising almost entirely of an equally immense picture window. Grand staircases flanked either side. In addition, Hock owned any number of genuine fine art canvases. The whole picture was an incredible sight in a world of digital images, cramped spaces, practical but unaesthetic architecture… Shepard, who knew nothing of fine art, found himself naturally drawn to the canvases. He led Kasumi to an abstract piece with vibrant colors and geometric patterning.

"Wassily Kandinsky," She marveled under her breath. "Nice." Kasumi looked around. "Hock must be a fan of Expressionist works from the early twentieth century."

Shepard followed her gaze around the room. The art was certainly impressive, but so was the crowd. He saw other well-dressed scoundrels, some with elegant companions, some with ruthless-looking business partners, and a few couples. He noticed a mustached man in a cowboy hat standing before the painting adjacent to the Kandinsky work. He and his partner, a very attractive woman who was obviously _not_ a companion, were murmuring to each other in low voices. About the painting, he assumed.

* * *

><p>Leaving the mule far behind under the protective cover of the forest foliage, Jayne traversed the terrain of the forest as best he could. The same vines and branches that concealed the mule and himself also threatened to entangle him. He approached the back entrance of Hock's mansion slowly.<p>

"We're in," Jayne heard Mal's voice in his ear piece.

"Already?" asked Jayne, incredulously.

"That be a fact." Mal responded. "Where are you?"

"Still in the gorram jungle." Jayne griped. "I'm… I'm making progress. Actually, I see the back door now."

"Shiny." Mal said. "Update us when you're in."

"Will do." Jayne whispered gruffly.

Jayne approached the back entrance, where he could see one guard posted. The man wore full body armor and carried a heavy pistol. Physically, he appeared to be a formidable enemy. Jayne watched him for a minute, trying to determine the best way to approach. The weapon given to Jayne would be rather conspicuous for a few minutes.

He decided to stick to basics. He groped around under the dense fern patch underfoot to locate a sizeable rock. From behind a vine-covered tree, he threw in the other direction to redirect the guard's attention. It thudded loudly on the concrete. The guard instantly perked up and readied his weapon to shoot in the opposite direction of Jayne. Jayne pulled the pin of his chloroform bomb and tossed it behind the man. The gentle hissing sound caused the guard to look back, trying to locate the source of the sound. He hit the ground before he could find the metallic sphere.

Jayne remained behind the protective foliage waiting to see if anyone would come, or if an alarm would sound. Had anyone noticed? The minutes of silence which followed declared the act unwitnessed and the victim completely unconscious.

_Huh_, Jayne thought. _That fugie doc may have a nutjob sister, but he sure is a clever wang ba dan himself._

Simon had designed the weapon himself, preferring that as few men be injured as possible. He had told Jayne to wait ten minutes for the bomb's contents to disperse before approaching, otherwise he'd be victim, too. The time passed slowly for Jayne, who was itching to go, but he didn't want to miss the excitement on account of his impatience. After the allotted time, he dragged the guard into the woods and stripped him of his armor. Jayne suited up. He picked up the new M-3 Predator pistol with reverence and looked it over. He smiled mischievously at the first of his anticipated pillage. He left the man tied and gagged albeit still unconscious.

Jayne radioed in to the anxiously waiting Serenity crew, "I've taken down the guard and suited up. Y'all get ready to get me in."

"Was the chloroform bomb effective? We had no way of testing it." Simon asked Jayne over the ear piece. His voice was solemn as always.

"That it was, Doc." Jayne responded.

"Have you detained the guard in any other way? Remember, the chloroform will only render him unconscious for…"

"Oh, don't worry." Jayne gave a gruff laugh. "That poor ben dan ain't goin' nowhere."

"I sincerely hope you have no injured him…"

Kaylee interrupted to bring the conversation back to the task at hand. "You at the door yet?" she asked. She sat next to Simon, both starting at the computer screen showing the schematics of Hock's extensive estate.

Jayne donned his new helmet and walked over to the door, as casual as possible. He looked around one final time to ensure the event had been unseen. He turned toward the door and surveyed it.

"I see a keypad," Jayne said. He waved his hand in front but nothing happened. "I think I need a code."

"A code… A code." Kaylee thought outloud.

Simon stated something inaudible to Jayne.

"What?" He demanded. "What's the code?"

The radio waves were silent minus a few murmured words.

"Stand alert and 'guard' that door while we figure that one out. It is possible you need that guard's omni-tool in order to scan it." Simon said.

"Son of a…." Jayne started, when he heard the door open behind him.

"Swinford." A man's voice called. "You're relieved of this post. Most of the guests have arrived and they want more eyes inside."

The man wore the same black and white armor that Jayne wore now. Jayne's own helmet offered him the necessary concealment to pull off the deception. Now to fool him with his voice...

"What're ya starin' at, dumbass?" the other guard asked before Jayne could respond to the original request.

"Yeah." Jayne said, distorting his voice to be gruffer than usual. "Nothing. Yeah. I'm on it."

"Swinford?" He asked. "You sound like hell."

"Yeah…" Jayne continued. "I'm just, huh, you know, huh… Recovering from a cold."

"Whatever." The other responded. "Just get your ass inside."

"Uh, roger!" Jayne awkwardly saluted and then scurried inside past.

Jayne walked quickly down the corridor. The hallway was empty save for a few dim lights and secure doors. When we felt he was a safe distance he radioed in.

"I'm in," he whispered to the crew.

"Excellent! But how?" Simon responded.

"Shiny! Who cares?" Kaylee said.

"You're doin' good." Mal affirmed. "Kaylee will guide you to the back of the vault."

Jayne followed the voice of his overly enthusiastic mechanic deeper into the hidden underbelly of Hock's estate.


	8. Chapter 8- Paths Converge

The wealthy rancher turned his head left and looked at the massive piece of art made of blotches and dots of many colors. He looked down his nose at the canvas over crossed arms. The attractive woman accompanying him surveyed the same piece. Her stoic look revealed none of her reflections on the work, nor of her relationship with the rancher or sentiments or perhaps lack thereof. Shepard found that despite the fact that the color of the woman's dress was a drab muted navy, she caught his eye like it was covered in flashing lights. The distance between the rancher and his partner was a cold abyss, growing ever wider as Shepard's imagination began to play with a new "partnering"...

"…and that's why Pollock was so misunderstood. A genius in his time!" Kasumi rambled. She stepped closer to him and only half-playfully smacked his arm. "Are you listening to me? His use of…"

Shepard tore his eyes away from the woman and held up a hand to silence Kasumi. "Your voice is starting to carry." He couldn't help but chuckle. "Okay." Shepard lowered his voice. "Pollock was a genius. I think we'd better move past the art critic conversation and onward to the… _heist_ conversation." He mouthed the forbidden word.

"Right," Kasumi whispered in agreement. "Sorry. I do believe I was starting to enjoy this party. Okay. I'll go assess the vault's entrance while you just stay and… Fit in." She rounded an empty corner and turned on her stealth cloak. "I'll be in radio contact. Remember, if anyone looks at you, give them the stink eye!"

"Of course," Shepard responded with a smile.

"And, Shep." She added. "Best to keep your eyes on the art."

_Busted_. Shepard thought. "Canvas only?"

Kasumi shook her head with a smile, though Shepard couldn't see her. She was all but invisible with her cloak activated. She descended the steps in back to a poorly lit hallway. She found the glowing holo button on the door right where she expected. Hacking into Hock's computerized security system and viewing the schematics of the estate had been a piece of cake for someone with her skill level. The door opened to reveal a small foyer. The vault door was flanked on either side by security equipment.

"Shepard." Kasumi radioed via earpiece. "I'm at the entrance. There's more here than I thought."

"What do you see?" Shepard all but whispered back.

"Password protected voicelock. Kinetic barrier. DNA scanner. Everything a vault needs to be impenetrable."

"Is this going to be a problem?"

"Please! Remember who you're talking to." Kasumi didn't try to hide the arrogance in her voice. "We'll need to cut the power to the kinetic barrier, record a voice sampling, get samples of Hock's DNA… I'm coming back up. Chatting up Hock seems like an easy place to start."

* * *

><p>"Gorramit, Mal." Jayne cussed quietly through gritted teeth. "There's more guards than you thought and these ain't useless Alliance types. These ones're hired mercs. Heavy arms and sharp aim."<p>

"We ain't got all day." Mal responded quietly amid the hum of party chatter.

"Just... Give me more time." Jayne said. "I'll take care of it. If we rush this, we'll be humped. Y'all just gotta sit tight for a bit."

Mal cussed under his breath.

In a low voice Zoe asked, "Status?"

"He wants us to 'sit tight.' Needs more time." Mal's voice was low as well and his tone tense, but his face indicated nothing more than light conversation to any would-be observers.

"Shiny." Zoe said monotone. "'Spose I'll be gettin' that culture my husband seems keen on exposing us to after all."

Mal's eyes had also tired of looking at the same piece for this length of time. He looked around the room. It appeared the entire party consisted of art, wine, and gossip, none of which were Mal's specialties.

"What are we supposed to do?" Mal asked himself. "Strut around and gawk at art? That's it?"

"It is surprising that this lot of criminals and murders cares to do something so dull." Zoe said.

Mal approached a painting and started to offer some dry commentary. "Oh, my. What an incredible piece of lese. I simply must have one for my mansion."

Zoe suppressed a laugh. Mal looked at her, then past her. His whole countenance lit up.

"Well, looky there!" Mal exclaimed. "If it isn't the belle of the ball!"

Zoe followed his gaze to find he had spotted Inara. She was standing next to the host himself, both apparently laughing at something a short man in a black and yellow suit had said.

"You promised not to interfere, Sir." Zoe reminded him through gritted teeth.

"Wouldn't dream of it!" Mal said. "Seeing as how she's having such a grand time and all. I mean, look. Laughing at whatever that stout little piece of work just said."

"Don't put your nose in her business, Sir."

"Right… Back to our important business of waiting around." Mal turned back to face the nearest painting and donned an exaggerated Southern gent accent. "I do decleh! I do evah so much love the ahtwork! With its col-ahs and paint! Have you seen this piece? Looks like a twisteh blew oveh a shelf of paint buckets at the hahdware stah."

Zoe laughed and rolled her eyes. "Best not to talk. My husband was right about you." She finished off her beverage and made to leave. "I'm off to grab another drink. The free liquor is the only redeeming thing about this party. Don't do anything… stupid, Sir."

* * *

><p>Inara laughed obediently at the story Hock just finished telling the stout guest before he excused himself for more refreshments. She lowered her head almost coyly and hid her delicate smile. When she raised her eyes again, she felt as much as saw another pair of eyes staring at her, and they weren't Donovan's. These eyes belonged to a stranger across the room. She stopped laughing and cocked her head to contemplate whether or not she knew him. When their eyes met, the man quickly turned his back to her, downed the rest of his liquor, and began to saunter off.<p>

_That was strange_, thought Inara.

"Something wrong?" Hock asked. He followed her gaze to find a man dressed in western wear.

_A cowboy hat?_ Hock thought to himself. _I don't remember letting a Yank in wearing a bloody hat like that._

Hock furrowed his eyebrows and stepped toward the stranger when he was interrupted by the gruff-looking fellow in a clean, black suit he had met at the door.

"Hock," the man extended his hand. "Hell of a party."

"Mr. Gunn," Hock acknowledged and shook Shepard's hand. "I'm glad you're enjoying yourself." His eyes grazed over Kasumi obediently standing to Shepard's back right quietly.

"It's been a while since I just relaxed." Shepard acted his part. "Business is booming back on Illium," He winked his white-pupiled eye at his host.

Hock laughed. "I hear that. It can be difficult for men of our caliber to find a moment's respite when work is so… Abundant."

"Good you made time. And opening your own doors for the occasion…" Shepard gestured around the room. "Gutsy move. I'm surprised you don't have more security."

"Ah, yes." Hock smiled as though pleased his guest had noticed. "I hope it sends a message that I do not fear anyone, nor anything. Men like you and me… We know the true cost of galactic stability. We make enemies because we are the only ones willing to do what it takes to maintain the illusion of peace. But those enemies will not deter me from living my life. This party is for us! May there always be a market for the things we do!"

Hock's voice rose as he spoke, to the point that some of the guests nearby overheard and clapped as his speech ended. Inara joined in obediently, thought she had not really been listening too closely. She had been looking around at the odd assembly of guests to find the rancher again, but he eluded her. She did notice Gunn's companion nudge him in the side surreptitiously with her elbow.

"Well put." Shepard said. "Now if you'll excuse me, my companion and I would like to continue enjoying your party."

"Of course."

Inara offered them a slight curtsey. She cocked an eyebrow at Gunn's companion. Something about her felt off. Inara was unaccustomed to her style of dress and she carried herself differently than Guild companions would. She acknowledged that the Guild was not the only governing body of professional companions, however. Perhaps her demeanor simply reflects different training? She was beginning to wonder why Donovan Hock's party had attracted such a strange assortment of guests.

"Good job, Shep." Kasumi whispered when they were sufficiently distanced from Hock. "I've got the voice recording on my omni-tool. Next up, let's go get some DNA samples."


	9. Chapter 9- Lipstick and Sardines

Jayne wound his way through the concrete maze of Hock's basement with Kaylee's help. Many twisting and turning hallways exited into large garages or storage facilities. He found that most of these areas were poorly lit with spotty florescent lighting and had crates stacked seemingly haphazardly throughout and, of course, mercs. Too damn many mercs, some armed to the teeth.

Jayne assumed that this was where the real work was getting done that enabled Hock to put on his fancy airs up top where he was apparently really impressing Inara, according to Mal's bitter running commentary.

His heart raced with anxiety and fear the deeper he went. Jayne was a good fighter, but knew that even if he'd been armed to the teeth like these men, even with his ol' trusty girl Vera at his side, he'd still be no match for these guns for hire with their full body armor and professional training. He was going to have to use brain, not brawn… Something Jayne admitted to himself was a little lacking. Fortunately, Jayne's armor had allowed him to traverse the building almost unnoticed, until he accidentally bumped into someone.

"Shit, Swinford. Watch where you're going."

Jayne stopped for a moment and shuffled his feet awkwardly. The man looked him over for a moment and reached up his hand. Jayne quickly went for his weapon.

"I'm still reeling from my hangover." The guard placed a hand upon head. "How are you holding it together? Dude, you were more wasted than I was last night!"

Jayne's hand slowly lowered. "Oh… Uh… Yeah." He tried out another voice since the gruff one didn't fool the first guard. It came out more nasally than he'd intended.

"You alright?" The man asked. "You sound weird."

"Just… Oh, my aching head!" Jayne feigned.

"No shit." The guard said. "By the way, how the hell do you plan on paying Herndon back?"

"Uhh…" Jayne says.

"Do you even remember? You owe a shit load. Man, you suck at poker."

"Oh, right.. Right… Hell if I know." Jayne shrugged.

"Well, I'd watch my back. Herndon has slit throats for less."

"Sure. Yeah. I'll make sure I don't bump into him."

"Him?" The guard asked suspiciously. "Herndon's the butch chick from Omega…"

_Oh, crap._ Jayne looked to either side to make sure they were out of sight before he knocked him out cold. He left the guard sitting up in a hunched over position behind a crate. _Yup, that hangover's a biao zi. You better rest there._

Jayne entered the next room. It was quite open with large exhaust vents here and several land racers parked there.

"You're almost there," Kaylee said over the radio. "Based on your location… Can you get to that far wall, on your left?"

"It's well guarded…" Jayne said.

"That's what the chloroform bombs are for." Simon reminded him.

"Right." Jayne said. "Just give me a few minutes."

"Mal, how are you fairing up top?" Simon asked seated beside Kaylee.

"Why!" Mal exclaimed gleefully! "I just got married!"

"What?!" Everyone said in unison.

* * *

><p>"You stay here, Shep." Kasumi said. "This is going to be embarrassing."<p>

"For me? I'm hard to embarrass." Shepard assured her.

"Not for you."

"For you?"

"Please…" Shepard could see a smile play on Kasumi's bright red lips. "This will be fun."

"For who?"

"For the guard." Kasumi smirked. "I'm off to make him an offer he cannot refuse…"

Shepard cocked his head to the side and mirrored her devious smile.

Kasumi turned on her heel. "Listen in… If you dare."

She left the main hall and approached Hock's personal quarters. She and Shepard both agreed there would be more than enough DNA samples in there. The guard eyed her momentarily before resuming his dutiful watch of the party guests. Kasumi leaned against the wall, a mere six or eight feet away from the guard. She sighed heavily. She noticed through her peripheral vision that the guard glanced at her, but then looked back at the main hall again. She sighed again, more exaggerated and pathetically this time.

"What's your problem?" The guard asked, seemingly annoyed.

"Hmm...?" Kasumi said in the sweetest voice she could conjure.

"What's your problem?" The guard repeated.

Kasumi laced her hands together delicately and sauntered closer to him, hips swaying. "Oh, this party… It's so dreadfully dull."

The man harrumphed as his reply, never resuming eye contact. She approached much closer than the guard seemed comfortable with. His back stiffened and his chin lifted proudly.

"Are _you_ enjoying this party?" Kasumi batted her eyes at him.

"What do you think?"

"On duty… I suppose not." Kasumi responded coyly. "I'm 'on duty,' as well. The man who commissioned my services…" Kasumi stated the last word with a breathlessness that made the guard falter a moment. "See that poor old sap: balding white head, permanent scowl?" She pointed to first unattractive male guest she could find. "He just wanted an arm trophy."

"He picked a good one." The guard conceded and looked her over.

"Yes…" Kasumi smiled and shifted her hips flirtatiously. "But, I don't companion just to be _looked_ at." She closed the gap between them. "Being beautiful is only half of what I do.

The guard cleared his throat. "What's the other half?"

Kasumi pushed her body up against his. The guard froze in place.

"Men." She whispered. "But this one cannot seal the deal, due to his impotence… Which leaves me with an… empty… feeling inside."

"Oh…" The guard's eyes widened.

"You look like a strong, healthy, _virile_ young man. I don't suppose you would be interested in enjoying this…" She rubbed against his body suggestively. "…at someone else's expense, would you?"

The guard finally broke. "Hell, yeah! There's a bed on the other side of this door!"

"Damn, Kasumi!" She heard Shepard exclaim in a hushed voice as he watched the guard lead her through the door. Shepard continued listening, hearing the sound of two bodies brushing up against one another, two sets of lips kissing, a man breathing heavily, and… Kasumi's light laughter. Shepard would never admit to Kasumi he was a little disappointed.

"What happened?" Shepard asked via radio.

"The good night kiss." Kasumi explained. "This red lipstick isn't just cosmetic. It's also a weapon. One kiss and the narcotic compound inside causes men to pass out for hours."

"Wow!" Shepard had never heard of the drug before.

"The guard is asleep on the bed. I'll get what I need quickly and rejoin you out there."

"I'll be waiting." Shepard acknowledged and wandered around the main hall trying to look as casual as possible. Over the comms he could hear Kasumi talk to herself as she poked around Hock's personal quarters:

"Hock plays Galaxy of Fantasy? I'm sure his buddies would love to know about that one!"

"Fornax: The Lady Krogan Edition!" Pages shuffle and Kasumi vocalizes her disapproval. "Eww! Oh, heaven help me, what is this doing here? I _hope_ this doesn't contain DNA samples."

"Oh, my… A frilly thong and fuzzy cuffs… Now we know that Hock's companion is a lady on the streets, but a freak in the sheets."

Shepard mumbles something.

"Pardon, Shep?"

"Nothing!"

"Well, I swabbed his wine glass and found a hair on the couch. That's enough… Let's get those kinetic barriers disabled. That's when the go-upi is going to the proverbial fan. You ready?"

* * *

><p>Mr. Gunn and his companion pass through the art galleries to a rather secluded alcove containing an electric fireplace, ample bookshelf, comfortable seating, and the kinetic barrier's power source. The same alcove is also occupied by two chatty couples, a mercenary and his numerously scarred better half and the rancher and the sexy woman accompanying him, which according to the conversation is his wife.<p>

Shepard spares a glance her way while using his omni-tool to locate the power source hidden within the walls. _Damn._ He thinks of the rancher's wife._ All the good ones are taken._

Mal and Zoe barely notice Mr. Gunn. Their laughter can be heard several alcoves over. Mal grabs Zoe's hand. "And I just knew I had to have her, even if the deal came with too many tons of sardine tins for my taste."

The mercenary laughed. "Ahh… The cost of doing business… Sometimes you gain a wife, sometimes you lose a wife, and sometimes you get conned into buying a wife with a dowery of fish products."

Shepard tried to focus on his job and the conversation faded into the background. The wires were actually incredibly easy to locate thanks to Kasumi, but he needed an unobserved moment to disconnect them. He whispered his dilemma to Kasumi, who covered his back nonchalantly.

Shepard's ears picked up on the surrounding conversation again.

"And then I said," Boasted the rancher. "My yacht's in the shop, so we'll have to take my private helicopter instead." His wife chimed in with an unnaturally haughty laugh.

Shepard rolled his eyes and shook his head. _Rich people. Self-absorbed rich people. Self-absorbed rich people making wealth at others' expense._ He quickly reminded himself that those injustices are some of the reasons he gets up every morning and fights. He decided he was happy Kasumi brought him here, but wished he could spend the evening clean house a little more and looking at art a little less.

The kinetic barrier went offline and not a soul attending the party noticed.

"That's it!" Kasumi whispered. "I'm going to activate my stealth cloak. We don't have much time before they notice. Meet me in front of the vault."


	10. Chapter 10- Who's Who

"That's it, Mal!" Jayne radioed in sounding very pleased with himself. "We're ready to go. Get your asses down here."

Mal ended his exaggerated laughter to interrupt his own story. "I'm terribly sorry, Janey, Forks. It's best the wifey and I be off. We've got a shipment of priceless heads of cattle due before long and our indentures aren't authorized to accept them. You know how it is. Duty calls!"

"Indeed!" The man nicknamed Forks agreed. "Nice to have met good honest folk. Best of luck to you and the missus."

Zoe took Mal's crooked elbow and the couple sauntered off, chins high in the air. The few eyes that turned their way held no suspicion of their true intentions for departing the party hall.

Mal turned his head to face Zoe. "Jayne," He said addressing his absent crewmate. "Great job down there. No one up here ever suspected a thing. We're on our way. Lead us down the rabbit hole."

* * *

><p>Kasumi, invisible under stealth cloak, returned to the vault, her planned rendezvous point with Shepard. She rubbed her fingers together, feeling a little nervous that the moment had finally arrived. She had dreamed of avenging Keiji for so long.<p>

"Coast is clear." She radioed Shepard.

Shepard quickly left the main room and entered through the door leading to the vault's entrance. He whistled as he took in the surroundings.

"That's some heavy security." He said. His exploring eyes also found the statue of Saren that he and Kasumi had gifted to Hock before entering the party. He glared at the statue. "That wang ba dan's eyes follow me wherever I go." Shepard noted.

"That 'wang ba dan' was your ticket in the door and now…" Kasumi activated her omni-tool and pressed a few holo buttons. A drawer beneath Saren's statue slid open to reveal Shepard's armor, Kasumi's own special hooded suit, and their weaponry.

"Alright." She said. "Get dressed while I take out the security cams. Hock will only stay oblivious for so long."

Shepard gladly stripped out of his three piece suit and down to his under armor. He suited up in the armor as quickly as he could, requiring Kasumi's help with a few pieces. She had taken out the cameras within seconds and her veil was first item of clothing she removed.

"God, that thing was itchy." She cast it aside.

Shepard turned around to allow Kasumi privacy as she undressed the rest of the way and donned her familiar suit. The two grabbed their weaponry and Kasumi went to work on the security panels.

"Are you sure we have everything we need to bypass all this?" Shepard wondered aloud.

"Absolutely." Kasumi assured him.

True to her word, the vault's security was breeched without trouble and Shepard and Kasumi found themselves descending the elevator. The door opened to reveal the immense space that was the vault.

"This is… Incredible." Shepard gaped. "He's only one man but he owns a museum."

"Thousands of historically important artifacts, but only one truly priceless item: Keiji's greybox." Kasumi said.

"How will we find it amid so many things?"

"Actually, it emits a certain electrical frequency, a signature. My omni-tool will scan the room, read the signature, and lead us right to the greybox."

She activated the scanner and the two heard a rhythmic beeping which quickened as they neared their target. They passed a statue of a rachni queen, a vintage Kassa Locust, and a mummy from a far gone ancient Earth civilization. The scanner beeped furiously as they approached a small, unremarkable-looking device. Amid all of the obvious treasures, it looked out of place to Shepard, but Kasumi picked it up and cradled it with reverence. "Oh, Keiji."

"So, that's what we came for?" Shepard asked.

"Yes," Kasumi confirmed. "Thank you for accompanying me, Shep. This means the world to me."

"You're welcome, but we're not out yet. Let's…" Shepard was interrupted by a phenomenally loud and destructive explosion on the far wall. He and Kasumi cursed aloud, their ears ringing. They instinctively ducked low, Kasumi clutching the greybox with white knuckles. Each immediately drew their weapons and aimed for the direction of the wall, though dust and debris inhibited their vision. They saw the silhouettes of three figures cross the threshold. They couldn't make out much, but they saw they were armed. Shepard and Kasumi kept their eyes glued to the figures as well as their gun barrels.

As the smoke cleared, the confusion set in. Shepard and Kasumi recognized two of the faces, accompanied by an unfamiliar man wearing the black and white guard's body armor. The three intruders had expected to encounter Hock's guards, but instead found familiar faces as well. The five exchanged looks of bewilderment.

Shepard stared at the rancher and his wife. "You from the party!?"

Mal stared at Mr. Gunn and his companion. "You from the party?!"

"Hmpf!" Kasumi thought out loud. "Well, that was unexpected."

No one dropped their guard as they tried to figure out who was friend and who was foe. As the group mused aloud, Donovan Hock walked in the front entrance of the vault with Inara on his arm. All five guns and faces turned toward him immediately, each person agitated by the confusion. Hock raised his hands to show he was unarmed, though it was a mockery considering the guards flanking him on either side held pistols.

"I was having a smashing time upstairs, but I didn't realize the true fun was happening down here." His eyes caught Kasumi's, now unveiled, and he recognized her. "Ah, Kasumi! I should have known it was you." Every agitated pair of hands turned a gun toward her.

"I'm sure you've been anticipating my visit for some time." She said through a scowl.

Inara surveyed the crowd as well to find the wealthy rancher's hat missing and his mustache hanging off his face. "Mal! You promised not to interfere this time!" She scolded him. All guns turned from Kasumi to Mal.

"Don't blame me!" Mal looked around for an excuse. "Zoe was in on it from the start."

"Real mature, Sir." Zoe said. All guns turned from Mal to Zoe.

"I ain't the one that hatched this scheme." Zoe told the gun barrels. "As the _second_ in command, anything I say has to be approved by the Cap'n, the shan-yi de bai-chi standing right there."

"Wait." Shepard said. "You're not his wife?" All guns turned from Zoe to Shepard.

"I don't think that's important right now, Shepard." Kasumi stated through gritted teeth.

"Shepard!" Inara exclaimed. "I knew that was you!" All guns turned from the former Mr. Gunn to Inara. She just folded her arms annoyed. "Why did you lie to me?"

"I… Ah…" Shepard fumbled as he glanced at Kasumi.

"Well, now I have a name to accompany the eyes that stared at my ass all night." Zoe said.

"How _do_ you know Pearl Eye, here?" Mal demanded of Inara.

"Seriously, Shep." Kasumi seconded. "You know Hock's companion?"

Shepard looked up and whistled innocently.

"He was a client." Inara waved off as though it were no big deal. "And you, Donovan." She turned to face Hock. "How do you know Shepard's companion? This… Kasumi?"

All guns pointed back to Donovan. He answered with a malicious smile. "Through an old friend."

Kasumi glowered at him and readied her weapon.

Jayne put two fingers in his mouth to whistle loudly and all guns turned to him. "What the hell are we standing around here playing who's who for? So it's a small 'verse after all. Who the hell cares who those two are?" He pointed to Shepard and Kasumi with his gun barrel.

Hock looked at the five before him with a confused expression. "These are not all your accomplices, Kasumi?"

Again, Jayne spoke up. "We're not with them! We just came to raid your treasure box of a few odds and ends. I don't know who the hell they are!"

"Bi zui chun dan!" Mal cussed and hit Jayne upside the head.

"Ah," Hock said, a slight smile playing on his lips. "An honest thief. And you, Kasumi… You're here for my greybox, no doubt?"

"It's not yours, you xie-e de hundan!" Kasumi shouted. "It's all that remains of Keiji and it belongs to me!"

"Then you are all my adversaries, not my guests." Hock said.

Jayne spoke up again. "Great. Glad we figured that out!" He turned to Kasumi. "You take yours, we'll take ours, and we'll be outta here quicker'n you can spit!"

The Serenity crew and the Normandy crew stared at each other a second, shrugged, and all pointed guns back to Hock in a display of unification against him.  
>"Everyone, find cover!" Shepard shouted as he unleashed the first bullet and the group of new allies dispersed immediately.<p>

Hock threw himself into an outrage, pushing Inara out of the way forcefully. "Guards! Fire!"

Everyone found cover quickly, ducking behind displays of various sculptures and vintage weaponry before the guards sprayed the vault with bullets.

"Shoot the thieves, not the treasures!" Hock shouted over the noise.

* * *

><p>Aboard the Serenity, Kaylee and Simon had completed their task and reintegrated with the rest of the crew who were just starting a new round of their favorite fruit-themed card game while they awaited further instruction.<p>

"How's the party goin'?" Wash asked, dealing a deck of cards to include Kaylee and Simon in the hand.

"According to Mal, dull." Simon said.

"Art, wine, sophistication… Those things are not really his strong suit. He must be dreadfully bored." Shepherd looked at the five cards in his hand, trying to hide his disapproval.

"I wish I coulda gone." Kaylee said with a dreamy look in her eye. "The last time I went to one of Inara's parties, I had the best time. Got to chat with handsome men about trace compression blocks and other engine talk." She sighed. "The fresh food, the pretty dresses… And it turns out Captain Tight Pants is actually a good dancer. I'll bet there's dancing."

* * *

><p>Mal tore from behind the display case, yipping and hollering as he let bullets fly toward the Eclipse guard before him.<p>

"Hell, yeah!" He exclaimed when he found cover again. "My kinda party after all!"

Another guard surprised him from behind, but Mal blocked his punch firmly with his forearm.

He smiled at the guard's surprise.

"You wanna dance, darlin'?" He quickly grabbed the guard's wrist to twist it around to his back. His enemy shrieked in pain.

* * *

><p>"I imagine Jayne's bored as well." Simon commented. "I insisted he harm as few people as possible, so I armed him with chloroform bombs. He's probably looking forward to the looting, however."<p>

* * *

><p>Jayne closed the gap between him and the guard who had asked him about his hangover earlier. The guard's eyes widened as Jayne approached.<p>

"You're not Swinford." He said confused.

"My name's Jayne _mama-ta ma de_ Cobb!" Jayne yelled as he headbutted the guard. The man fell instantly. "Whoo!" Jayne yelled and shoved more valuables into his loot bag. "I'm gonna buy me a whole moon and populate it with buxom ladies and be the KING!"

* * *

><p>"Speaking of slinky dresses…" Wash started.<p>

"No one is speaking of slinky dresses, dear pilot." Shepherd eyed him over his splayed cards.

"I'm speaking of slinky dresses." Wash said. "Hugging the curves of a warrior goddess… Mm! I couldn't keep my eyes off of her." Wash said equally as dreamily as Kaylee.

"I'm surprised you approved of the ensemble. I hope other men can keep their eyes off of her." Simon said.

"Damn straight! I'll kick their asses!" Wash said. "Ah, who'm I kiddin'?" His dreamy look returned. "Zoe will kick their asses for me."

* * *

><p>Zoe lifted her leg to kick the guard in the face, but the fabric restricted her movement.<p>

"Gai-si de lifu!" She cussed aloud.

The guard faltered at the sight of her long leg kicking up in the high-slitted dress.

_Well, now I have to knock you out, you fan-chang._

She resorted to punching him square on the nose instead, which worked equally as well.

At the sight of Zoe felling his last standing guard, Hock let out a frustrated growl.

"Get up you bunch of mu-gou duibuqi erzi! Finish them!" Hock shouted.

Most of the guards didn't move. The few that did struggled just to lift their heads. In the meantime, Shepard and Kasumi bolted for the make-shift exit. Mal and Zoe trailed close behind, followed lastly by Jayne who hurriedly gathered a few more treasures amid their insistent pleas. Hock's hands clenched into fists and he bolted back out the vault's entrance.

Inara, who had taken up shelter behind the solid concrete base of a colossal statue, uncovered her ears and looked from entrance to fabricated exit several times. After the tour of Donovan's estate yesterday, she had an idea of where he was headed and feared for the Serenity crew and Shepard and his imposter companion. She quickly followed the five out the hole in the wall to warn Mal.


	11. Chapter 11- The Mantis

"You're a sharp shot," Mal told Shepard with a genuine air of respect.

Shepard smiled at the obvious statement. "Not bad yourself. You certainly have a unique… style."

"Hell, yeah!" Jayne joined in. "We just cleaned house! Look at all this loot!"

"Don't count your chickens yet, Jayne." Zoe said, then turned to Mal. "It's high time we leave this xiaobian dong planet behind, Sir."

"Right." Mal said sending a furrowed brow look toward Jayne. "But Plan A had been to use the chloroform bombs to put the guards to sleep, sneak through the vault's back door, and waltz outta here undetected. Jayne blew that plan."

Jayne smiled deviously. "I had to im_per_vise on account'f the first plan was boring."

"'Course." Zoe said. "Don't know how you snuck grenades past us and the guards, but what's done is done."

"This wasn't our original plan either. We need an alternative." Shepard tells the group while looking at Kasumi.

"You're used to rolling with the punches, Shep." Kasumi said. "I still have the schematics on my omni-tool. We'll just have to fight our way out."

"I entered through the back. I know the way." Jayne offered help. "We gotta get back to the mule."

"The back way should work for us, too. Our shuttle is parked nearby." Shepard said.

Mal shrugged at Zoe. "We ain't got much other choice."

Zoe made eye contact with Shepard and Kasumi respectively, as though judging their trustworthiness, and back to Mal. "I'm behind you, Sir, whatever the plan." Zoe said.

Shepard and Mal looked at each other for a moment, the leaders of their own prospective groups, with the same judging look Zoe had.

"We're better off working together. I'm in." Shepard extended a hand.

"Deal." Mal shook it. "Let's get the hell out of here."

Hock's reinforcements entered the basement and located the group. All five ducked behind cover and readied their own weapons. Inara arrived at Mal's side as the bullets began to fly.

"I need to talk to you!" She said.

Mal yelled over the fire, "Not a good time!" He shot a guard out and celebrated his small victory. "Did you see that shot? I'll bet your Donovan is a piss-poor shot."

"Possibly, he's not really a… Well, I _thought_ he wasn't… I don't know anymore… Mal! I need to talk with you about him." Another bullet whizzed by. "I think you've under-estimated Donovan, if this is your plan."

"All the bullets flying in our direction…" Mal said. He peered past the side of the barrier and took another shot. "This isn't how I wanted the evening to end, but it's much livelier than that funeral upstairs, I must say!" He peered around the barrier again.

"Mal!" Inara shouted.

Shepard interrupted everyone by announcing the immediate room had been cleared. Kasumi lowered her weapon and began typing into her omni-tool to pull up Hock's schematics, but Jayne confidently stood up and said. "Follow me!"

Kasumi looked up and shrugged. "You heard the man!"

"Alright. Let's mosey!" Mal followed.

"Qiu zhu lianmin," Inara said as the group moved forward in unison.

* * *

><p>"That's the door!" Jayne yelled as they approached the exit.<p>

Zoe looked back down the hall where they'd come from. "No enemy boots behind!"

The whole group filed out one by one. They maintained readied weapons when entering the exterior of the building, but six pairs of eyes looking left and right detected no enemy presence. Slowly everyone but Inara dropped their weapons and replaced them with high-fives and slaps on the back.

"Way to go!"

"Hell, yeah! That's how it's done!"

"That was almost easy."

Inara raised her own voice amid the celebration. "You must stop celebrating! You don't understand! I am pretty certain Donovan left to get his…"

The sound of a gunship approached suddenly.

"Back inside!" Shepard shouted and Inara was the first to try opening the door, but found that it was locked. "Shit. Take cover! Quickly. In the jungle." He hurried the Serenity crewmembers toward the trees and looked up again. "That's an A-61 Mantis Gunship." He rushed through an explanation. "It's loaded with weaponry, military-class kinetic shields… Let us handle this!"

"Gou-pi, you don't have to ask me twice!" Jayne said and dove under cover.

"Shepard, do be safe." Inara pleaded.

"You know I'm a soldier. I know what I'm doing." He said and placed his hand upon her face briefly. "Now hide!"

A tirade of bullets flew from the machine gun mounted on the gunship, causing Shepard to wrap his arms around Inara and shield her body with his. When the fire stopped, he scooped her up and carried her to Mal's side deep under the forest canopy. Shepard took her face into his hands, checking to make sure she was alert and breathing. Her pale face betrayed her fear, but a quick look-over revealed no injuries.

"Watch over her," He ordered Mal before running back out to join Kasumi.

Kasumi had evaded the bullets as well and looked around for the location of the gunship. Hock swung back around and broadcast his now furious and frantic voice: "Kasumi Goto. I respect your nerve to intrude into my home and your skill to break into my vault, but I want what's in that greybox, and I'm willing to kill for it! You're going to die screaming, like your old friend!"

"Not a chance, you bastard!" Kasumi yelled.

She unleashed her heavy pistol's bullets his direction, which hit, but caused no damage. Hock's laughter resounded from his speakers, echoing off the mansion walls, doubling the insult.

"Your anger will only get you killed." Hock said. "You're in over your head."

"You will pay for Keiji's death! You…" Kasumi was interrupted by Shepard's forceful hand behind her head. "Take cover!" He demanded and all but pushed her toward large, shaded underbelly of the nearby balcony. "You can't avenge Keiji if you're dead!"

Hock unleashed more bullets, but the pair reached the balcony and Hock seemed hesitant to destroy his own property.

"You cannot hide forever." Hock mused. "My reinforcements will hunt you down like a pack of dogs."

Kasumi fumed and cussed under her breath. Shepard placed a hand on each of Kasumi's shoulders and looked her in the eye. "We know he's not bluffing, Kasumi." Shepard said, trying to focus her again. "He's not going to let us walk out of here. What do you want to do?"

"March out there and blow his ta ma de mian out of the sky!" Kasumi declared with a wild look in her eye.

Shepard squeezed her shoulders tighter. "Okay." He acknowledged in a calm, but firm voice. "But that would most likely wind up getting you killed. I'm here for you, Kasumi. We're in this together. I'm willing to take down that gunship, but we need a plan."

Kasumi closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. She grabbed each of Shepard's hands and dropped her head. Shepard's heart broke to see her so defeated.

"What other weapons are you carrying besides your pistol?" He brainstormed. "Or, could you use your stealth cloak? He should be unable to detect you."

Kasumi's head raised up again, this time with a devious smile and a twinkle in her eye. "You're a genius, Shep!" Kasumi pulled him into a quick hug. She ran off and disappeared, according to Shepard's perspective, but he could hear her voice as she called behind her: "Keep Hock busy and near the balcony!"

_I think I just got demoted to bait._ Shepard thought.

Under the protective cover of the forest, Mal, Jayne, and Inara listened to the ensuing battle. Zoe had grown agitated upon hearing about "reinforcements" and decided to leave the group to play look-out. Mal kept close to Inara's side, as Shepard had demanded.

Shepard toed the edge of the balcony's protection, pulled out his M-97 Viper sniper rifle and shot at Hock's suspended aircraft. The bullets had seemingly no effect, nor did Hock seem to notice.

_Gou-pi, just as I thought. The Mantis' shields are too powerful. I hope this is one hell of a plan you have, Kasumi._

Shepard switched to his pistol and left his hiding place. He ran and aimed, almost brandishing the pistol to get Hock's attention. Hock took the bait.

"Mr. Gunn." Hock laughed. "You plan on taking down a gunship with a single pistol?"

Shepard let go of a bullet aimed at the cockpit to answer Hock's question. The shields deflected it carelessly.

_Damn it. _

Shepard kept moving to keep Hock interested. He avoided nearing the forest for fear that stray bullets would hit the Serenity crew.

_Where's Tali's energy drain when you need shields taken out? Or… Oh._

Suddenly Shepard knew Kasumi's plan.

"Why don't you land that thing and fight face to face like a man?" Shepard yelled, unsure whether or not Hock could hear.

"Where is your little friend, Mr. Gunn?" Hock asked. "I'm not pleased that you partnered with her to steal my greybox, but she's the one I'm after. You're just a nuisance that my guards will finish off."

As if on cue, the back entrance to Hock's mansion spewed forth several armed guards. They stopped to take aim for Shepard, who was unaware of their presence.

"Shep, look out!" He heard Kasumi's voice through his earpiece.

Shepard looked around just in time to see the one on the far right collapse without a sound. The others looked over at their fallen comrade and then looked at each other, confused. Shepard had not fired a shot. The one standing between the two fell next. Shepard took out the last. He looked toward the forest to see the ghost of woman's shadow. He knew it was the rancher's partner. He nodded his thanks.

The gunship unleashed another round of bullets. Shepard rolled out of the way. He took a quick survey of himself after the round ceased.

_No injuries. My luck is going to run out quick, Goto_. He motioned to activate his mic, but Kasumi beat him to it.

"Look up." Kasumi's voice said.

Shepard obeyed and looked back at the hovering gunship. To his surprise, Kasumi had uncloaked herself and stood crouched over the cockpit of the gunship. She banged on the glass and Hock's confused eyes caught hers. She waved and offered a devious smile before using her omni-tool to overload Hock's shields. They dropped instantly.

"Fire away!" Kasumi shouted and descended using the retractable rope line that, Shepard presumed, she'd ascended with.

Shepard gladly aimed for the gunship, taking out the left wing with a few precise shots. The aircraft lost control quickly and crashed in the lush forest, far from the Serenity crew's hideout. The stilled engine caused a deafening silence. Shepard stared at the plume of smoke now rising from where the gunship had fallen. As his ears stopped ringing, he could make out the commotion above him.

"Someone call a medic!" He heard.

Hock's remaining party guests were filing out to line the banister of the balcony, pointing and shouting.

"What happened?" Someone yelled.

"What the hell was that noise?" Someone demanded.

Kasumi materialized next to Shepard, causing him to jump. "We did it!" Kasumi hugged him tightly around the neck. "But, we should probably get the hell out of here."

"Of course," Shepard agreed. "Right away. Just let me… check on Inara."

Kasumi followed Shepard back to the forest. Zoe still stood at the forest's edge. The three returned to Jayne, Mal, and Inara, informing them that Hock's plane had been downed, but that they needed to leave immediately. Jayne reminded Shepard that the mule was just a little further down while Zoe radioed Wash to ready Serenity for a quick getaway. Shepard approached Mal and Inara.

"How are you?" Shepard asked Inara.

"Fine. Thank you… For checking up on me." Inara said. She had a remarkable amount of poise and courage for someone who had been shot at not even thirty minutes ago.

"I'll escort her to her shuttle." Mal said, a slight edge in his voice. "She's with us."

"'Us.'" Shepard repeated. "We never were formally introduced." He offered his hand. "I'm Commander John Shepard. Former Alliance soldier. I now command the Normandy SR-2, under Cerberus. I apologize for the insignia on this armor. Not my choice."

Mal's face hardened at the mention of "Alliance," but he took the man's hand and shook it. "I'm Mal, as you already heard. Prefer it's all you heard. You saved our asses and for that, I'm grateful, but me and mine… Let's just say we ain't keen on the rules and regulations of Council space."

"As evidenced by today's spectacular heist." Shepard laughed lightly and raised his hands up innocently. "I'm not a cop. I'm not here to apprehend anyone."

"That's fine." Mal said. "Today the 'verse was a might smaller than my usual preferences. I don't suspect we'll be crossing paths again."

"Hmm…" Shepard said. "I suspected you're not from Boltzmann. Your clothing and accent suggest the Border Planets of the Terminus Systems."

"I call the black my home." Mal said, though his face betrayed Shepard's deduction to have at least some truth.

Shepard thought about the human colonies in the Terminus Systems being abducted by the Collectors, but didn't want to alarm them with this still largely classified information. "That's good to hear. If you ever do find yourself in the Terminus, just…" Shepard glanced at Inara and bit his lip. "Be careful out there."

"Will do."

"Shepard." Kasumi interrupted hesitantly. "We should head back."

"Right." Shepard nodded. He reached out and squeezed Inara's hand briefly. "Good-bye." He offered the rest of the Serenity crew parting nods.


	12. Chapter 12- Treasures Untold

The shipside crew greeted the returned thieves, and innocent Inara, with enthusiasm and too many questions to answer. Inara's shuttle was the first to arrive. Inara exited with Mal whose fine western wear was ripped in places and whose hat was completely missing. All that remained of his thick mustache was the gummy adhesive.

"You're back, Cap'n!" Kaylee hopped over to Mal to hug him. She reached over to embrace Inara next. "Have you been rolling in a pile of leaves?" She asked, pulling a twig from Inara's hair. Inara smiled and reached up to feel her thick, black hair. "Not exactly."

The mule arrived shortly thereafter, much to Wash's relief. Zoe pulled the mule up the ramp and into the firefly. She immediately found a pair of arms waiting to embrace her: her husband's. Jayne still wore the black and white Eclipse armor with the M-3 Predator holstered. He sat with the bag of loot in his lap, hugging it tightly, a veritable thieving Santa Clause. A child-like grin played on his lips.

Kaylee turned to Jayne, "Whatcha got?!"

"Hell, I don't even know." Jayne slung the heavy bag around to set it on the floor.

Jayne opened the bag and looked inside. A wave of selfishness poured over him as his mind's eye turned the various items into so many credit chits that he would need several lifetimes to spend them all. He physically shook his head to dispel the thought. Mal had shown him mercy after turning Simon and River in to the Feds and Jayne never forgot it. He stepped back to remove himself from the temptation and said. "Take a gander for yourself."

Kaylee knelt down to explore the bag's contents. She pulled out the first thing her fingers found: a gold and deep blue Russian egg.  
>"Pretty!" She squealed. "It's shiny. Shiny means expensive, right, Cap'n?"<p>

"I reckon it does." Mal smiled.

"Mal was right about Hock. He had quite the collection. Everything here is worth a pretty penny." Zoe assured

"That is gorgeous." Inara agreed. Kaylee passed the egg to her and kept rummaging. She pulled out a vintage Rolex watch, the façade of which was surrounded by diamonds.

"Ohh!" She exclaimed.

She passed the watch on and dug deeper. She found and passed around several more items: a hand-forged sword in its embossed leather sheath, a diamond necklace, a vintage ERCS submachine gun, a decommissioned L1 biotic implant.

"Glad you like the pretties." Mal smiled at Kaylee. "We got plenty here and everyone takes equal share. I have the best damn crew in the 'verse and it's about time they got paid."

"By the looks of it, we'll be doing just fine for a mighty long time." Shepherd said.

"The Cap'n done good." Zoe agreed.

"So, what's the plan now?" Wash asked. "We should get back in the black."

"Sure thing." Mal said. "We gotta find us some buyers."

"Not to condone thievery..." Inara said. "But I do believe I can be of assistance in finding collectors willing to purchase many of these items."

"We better stow these prizes until then." Zoe said. "We ain't in the Terminus and I ain't keen on lining Alliance pockets if we get apprehended."

"She's right." Mal agreed. "Everyone put your treasure back in the bag. I know where it will fit that a ship search won't reveal. Wash, head up to the cockpit. Everyone else, prepare for take-off."

* * *

><p>Kasumi flew the shuttle back to the Normandy in relative silence, which Shepard found a little unsettling considering Kasumi's general ease of conversation. The excitement that had occurred planet-side was just another day in the life for Shepard. He didn't think twice about the fallen mercs and downed plane. He knew that Kasumi's line of work wasn't generally so full of explosions and guns, but that her silence most likely had nothing to do with her processing those things.<p>

The Kodiak drop shuttle settled back into the Normandy's hangar. The two sat captive in the shuttle as the hangar repressurized. Kasumi pulled out Keiji's greybox and manipulated it in her fingers. He could see her eyes start to glisten.

_Her mind must be processing her past, her present, and her future, with and without Keiji. _

"You hanging in there?" Shepard asked, trying to assess Kasumi's mental state without being intrusive.

Her response was delayed and without eye contact. "Of course, Shep. I finally have what I wanted."

"A lot happened down there. I'm here if you need someone to talk to about it."

"Thank you. Right now I would like to talk to Keiji."

A buzzing sound and a green signal portside of the hangar indicated to the shuttle's occupants that the environment was stabilized.

"You two are long overdue for a reunion." Shepard said. "And I'm long overdue for a shower. I need to wash off whatever remains of my war paint before anyone sees me."

Kasumi offered him a half-smile. He winked at her, patted her shoulder twice, and exited the shuttle. Kasumi activated her stealth cloak before exiting the shuttle. She didn't want to talk with anyone right now and was able to sneak past several grunts and shared an elevator with an unknowing Garrus before walking down the hallway back to her makeshift quarters in Port Observation.

The window shone of bright specks of light amid an intensely black background. She rubbed her fingers together nervously as she tore her eyes away from the immense emptiness out the window and looked at the greybox. She knew Keiji's memories were contained inside. The ones including her would be a more perfectly preserved database than the ones that constantly ran on repeat in her own mind. His death had occurred several years ago and her ephemeral memories had been slipping away from her. Sand through her fingers. Each replay lost a minor detail here, the camera getting out of focus there.

In her hands, however, Keiji's perspective of their time together was available to enjoy on demand. Never again would she be without him, and yet… She would always be without him. A tear let loose and rolled down her cheek. She had waited long enough. Kasumi activated the greybox and collapsed onto her back in her cot. Her holo visor lit up and his face materialized before her eyes.

_"Kasumi," Keiji's recorded voice spoke her name bittersweetly_.

Her heart beat quickened.

_"If you're seeing this, it's because I'm dead. The information we found is all here."_

_Glowing screen pages filed past Keiji's face, showing the depth of his encyclopedia of secrets._

_"If the Council ever caught wind of this, the Alliance could be implicated. The information is encrypted and you have the only key. If I am dead and people know about this data, I've made you a target and for that I'm truly sorry, my love."_

"Oh, Keiji." Kasumi breathed out loud.

_"I know you, Kasumi. I know you'll want to keep these memories forever, but you cannot live the rest of your life tied to this neural implant. Please. I have given you access to my biggest secret because you are the only one I trust with this information. Do what you will with it, only promise me that you'll destroy this greybox after you've enjoyed our memories one last time. __Hold them in your mind as a link to the past, but don't let them be chains that bind your future. You are young and beautiful, talented and funny… Please move on. Find another person to share your life with. That is what I want, Kasumi. Your life shouldn't end early just because mine did. I love you so much, and for that reason, I set you free. Good-bye."_

The recording ended. Tears flowed freely down Kasumi's temples. "I love you, too, Keiji." She whispered.

* * *

><p>"Shepard." Inara exclaimed, surprise in her voice. She had not ever expected to see his face on her client console again.<p>

"Inara." Shepard smiled. "What a pleasure to have seen you at the gala. I do wish it could have ended better."

"Likewise, Mr. Gunn." She smiled back and winked.

"Ah, yes." Shepard looked mildly embarrassed. "I'm sorry for lying to you, and I'm sorry for the way the night ended. Kasumi is one of my crew and she needed a favor… You understand?"

"Of course, John." She laughed sweetly. "You have always put your crew first."

Shepard shrugged. "They're the force that keeps the universe in order."

"Yes. What a wonderful captain you are to care so deeply."

"I care for you too, Inara. How are you?"

"Truly, I'm fine. What about yourself? You always neglect to take care of your own needs."

"You're right… My last appointment was ages ago."

"We should remedy that."

"When are you free next?"

"Well, I was scheduled to entertain Hock through tomorrow morning, so now."

"Right now, now?"

"How about yourself?"

"Free as a bird, Miss Serra."

"Wonderful. I'll prepare my shuttle for take-off. Just send me the Normandy's coordinates."

THE END

* * *

><p>AN: Thank you for reading! This short story was in no way meant to be a comprehensive reconciliation of the Firefly and Mass Effect universes. Many readers left reviews on this story with excellent ideas for more fun and mayhem out in the black. There are so few Firefly/ME crossovers. I would love to challenge you to write the next adventure for our favorite Big Damn Heroes!


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